Wedding, Pancakes, Paris, and Home for the holiday
by akid4ever83
Summary: Drama in the OC couldn't be an higher right now. Mix in a brother sleeping with his brother girl friend, a drunken night ending in a baby, a family being torn apart, while another one is growing, an empty promise, and all the new port drama that we love.
1. Chapter 1

**His life forever changed**

AN: I would like to thank Delise for the input on this fanfic, and giving me the idea, and Lindsay for helping me out. This fanfic is set in the future and will focus around the main four with major Seth and Marissa friendship down the line. 

I do not own the OC, if I did do you think I would be sitting here in this little old town with my parents. 

--------- 

As she stood in front of the full-length mirror in the bridal room, she could not help but wonder if she was doing the right thing. She knew deep down in her heart that she could never love him the way that he desired to be loved, but she did love him. She had always loved him, from the moment that he stood on the table at the kissing booth and declared his love in front of the whole school. Now six years later she was supposed to walk down the aisle to become Mrs. Summer Cohen in less then an hour, and the past three months kept flashing though her mind. Somewhere in between the tons of work, she had to do to finish for her fashion show, and getting the wedding plans final, she had fallen in love with someone else. There was no doubt in her mind that she loved Seth. Her shrink had told her this was just wedding jitters and that deep down as scared as she was about marrying Seth she knew it was the right thing to do. 

Truth be told she was far from certain that she was supposed to walk down the aisle and become Mrs. Summer Cohen. Last night had been the moment that made he realize maybe she shouldn't go though with this. One out of every two marriages end in divorce and she didn't want to be the one couple to end that way she couldn't do it to Cohen. She moved over to the window, and in the distance the Cohen family caught her attention, the family that had welcomed her into the family with open arms. If hurting Seth wasn't enough for her, the thought of hurting the Cohen's family help break her heart even more. 

As she watched the Cohen family, she could not help but scan the yard for the one person she really wanted to see. She knew that he would be here after all he was part of the family just like she was, but as she scanned the yard she didn't see him. She wondered if maybe he decided to ditch it. She replayed the last conversation in her head. 'Summer, I love you there is no hiding that, but I can't hurt Seth he is like a brother to me, but watching you marry him tomorrow will tear me apart. So I am asking you please make a choice. Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with?' she felt a tear start to run down her face. Until last night she didn't know how strong he had felt about her, and it was because of learning how he felt last night that made this choice even harder to make. 

She moved away from the window she could not look at the Cohen's right now knowing just how much pain she would cause them. She either married Seth and keep everyone happy. She could be happy with Seth she had been for the past six years, but on the other hand, she would hurt the one person she felt real with. With him, life was life it was not some game you got nothing but the truth even if you did not want it. She enjoyed it though it was a different way of looking at life. Being with Seth she had learn to play this game she gives a little and he takes a lot, or he gave a little and she would take a lot. It was never a game of truly changing for each other. It was always about who needed what at that moment. She had never really had that talk with her therapist and now it was to late she would have to figure it out on her own. 

There was a knock on her door. "Sum can I come in?' Marissa said from the other side of the door. 

She wiped the tear from her eyes, before she walked over to the door and opened it for Marissa. As glad as she was that her best friend had flown in from Paris she couldn't help but feel a little jealous about the fact that Marissa seem to have move past all the drama that happened in Newport. In her eyes, Marissa held the perfect life away from Newport where she would like to be right now. She walked up to her best friend with a fake smile on her face and gave he a hug. "When did you get in?" 

"About three hours ago," Marissa said as she stood back and looked at Summer. "Sum, you look beautiful in the dress. Cohen is going to be speech less up there. He does have his vows written down right?" Marissa asked with a playful little smile. 

"Knowing Cohen he's most likely in the backroom going over them with Ryan so much that Ryan will be able to say them," she said with a small smile. 

"Yeah, but I wonder can Ryan actually say all those words. I don't remember him every making any long speeches," Marissa said as she sat down on the chair next to the window. 

"Actually you would be surprised on how much he has really opened up over the past few years. Last months he went to a fashion show with me because Cohen had somewhere else to be, and I didn't want to go alone. He was so mingling with the whole room I felt like I was with Cohen, but on a more mature level," Summer said as she start to look out the window once again to the Cohen's family. The choice she was about to make would change the whole family. 

"That doesn't sound like Ryan at all," Marissa said. 

"Yeah I know he really has changed a lot, but in a good way he is still the same old caring Ryan who will do anything for his family and friends. He is one of those guys that you can always count on no matter what happens down the line. He knows how to really enjoy what life is right now, and unlike most of the people in Newport he doesn't play games." Summer said she hadn't meant to go on about Ryan like the way the she had, but she couldn't help it when his name came up she just had to talk about him and smile. She had not felt like that in a while, and it scared her what she might be missing if she did not take the chance. 

"Sum if sounds like you and Ryan have gotten close," Marissa said as she looked at her best friend. 

"Closer then you think," Summer said as she looked down at the ring. "Can I tell you something Marissa?" Summer ask as she looked up at her best friend. She had not really been part of her life, but she knew that she could always count on Coop when she needed a friend. 

------- 

He stood in front of all of Summer and his family and friend on this his wedding day. The day that he had dreamt about since he was just a little boy, and had a crush on the girl that he would never have a chance of having. Now though he had the girl, he had finally won her over, and would soon have her for the rest of his life. He knew the chance that they would end in divorce, but if he had learn anything from his parents marriage was that if you work hard you can work though anything. He looked over at his parents sitting in the front row of the church. He only hoped that him and Summer could work half as hard as they did in order to make this marriage work. 

He knew that Summer and him would not have the easiest marriage they had issues to work on like every couple, but he loved her, and she loved him that would be enough to get them though anything. Even Ryan had told him that just as they walked out into the church. He was actually worried about Ryan though for the past few months he seem like he wasn't all there, and as they walked into the church the moment that was suppose to lead to nothing but joy he felt Ryan tighten up. Seth looked over his shoulder at the man next to him that over the years become his brother. The brother he never had, but had always wanted. When Ryan walked into this life six years he had changed everything in some people eyes they might have thought it was for the worst, but no matter all the drama that come along with the change Seth wouldn't change it for the world. He had a brother, and would marry the girl of his dreams. The one person he could not picture living his life without. 

Everything in his mind was perfect today, but as he searches the church, he was surprise to see Marissa seated alone in the back of the church. He smiled a bit at the thought that she had made the trip over to be here on this day, but when he notice the sadness in her eyes his mood was changed. She did not know that he had his eyes fixed on her as she looked towards Ryan with the most hatefully eyes he had every seen before. They weren't the eyes of a ex lover who was still in love, but something more there had to be something more behind the pain. If those eyes didn't confuse him enough when she looked at him she looked at him with eyes the shown how she was truly sorry for what had happen, but there was nothing she had done that would upset him. His smile started to fade as Summer's father started to walk down the aisle towards them without Summer in hand. 

Seth had hoped that he just wanted to make sure that everything was perfect for his only daughter, but when he walked up to Seth and placed his hand on his shoulder Seth had this gut reaction to run, but his legs would not move. "Is everything okay Sir?" Seth asked the words so hard to get out. 

When he didn't say anything right away Seth knew that his life was over he looked at Ryan he normally could understand Ryan without words, but today Seth couldn't tell if Ryan knew something, or didn't. "I'm sorry Seth, but Summer has changed her mind," Mr. Roberts had said to Seth. 

He just looked at the man that was suppose to be his father in law, but now had just given him the worst news of his life. "Did she give you a reason?" Seth asked as he stepped back from him, he needed his space more then every right now as his life forever changed 

"Just that she had fallen in love with someone else," Mr. Roberts said. 

That was all that Seth had needed to hear he slowly backed away from Ryan and Mr. Roberts towards the door that he had just walked though moments before. As he reached the door, he ran as fast as he could towards the bridal room. His thought were racing a mile a minute and he wonder just what had happen to change her mind last night. She had told him she loved him, and know she found out she was in love with another man. As he stepped into the bridal room he found it empty expect for the wedding dress that Summer had made just for her. He walked over to the dress and took it in his hand it had her smell on it she had worn in today before she made her choice. He noticed a small note on the table under the window. He walked over to it and slowly sat down in the seat that she had written the letter in just a few minutes before. 

He open it up and felt the way the ink felt against the paper it was written with care like all of her letters to him, but it had a rushed feel like she needed to get it out before she was to scared to write it. 

_Dearest Seth, _

I am so sorry I could not tell you this to your face, but some how over the past three months I have fallen in love with someone else. I still love you, and don't you for one moment think that I do not love you because I do. It just I do not love you the way that you deserver to be loved. You need someone to love you with their whole heart, and someone you can really count on. You and me both know as much as we love each other for the past six years it has been nothing but a game. A game that I truly do not want to play anymore, and I do not think going to talk to someone will help. The guy I met taught me that about life that sometime it just not meant to be, and you need to learn to walk away. 

I know that I broke your heart into a million pieces right now, and someday I would like to explain this to you better, but I have to get going my father has gone to get me the car. I hope that one day we can sit down and talk. You will find someone who you can love with all your heart, and who will love you back, someone who you see as your equal, and who will grow and change with you. 

Love 

Summer 

------- 

As she watched Seth leave the church she knew what she had to do, she knew that she had to be the friend to Seth that everyone else seemed to stop being with him. She got up without anyone noticing, and walked out of the church she knew he was headed to the bridal room somewhere deep inside of her she knew he wanted to see it for himself. As she walked towards the door she was right there he was with Summer's dress in his hands. The one person who truly looked forwarded to this moment dreams came crashing down around him. She stepped back from the door frame to give him some time alone. 

As she stepped back from the door she felt someone behind her, as the word sorry almost slipped from her mouth she turned around to see who it was. All the pain that she had felt as she watched Seth just a moment before come out, "What are you doing here?" 

"Seth," was all he said. 

"I don't think so," Marissa said as she guided into into the room across from Seth's. She didn't want him to hear. "I know who's faught this is," she said with hint of hurt in her voice. 

"I know," Ryan said, "But there is only three people I have to explain it to and your aren't one of them." 

"No well, it seems that right now I'm the closest thing that Seth has to a real friend, and that's not saying much since I haven't really talked to him since I left," Marissa said as she leaned against the door. "But you on the other hand are his brother, and to even think about doing something like this to him he is never going to forgive you." 

" It was a choice I made," said Ryan as he looked down at the ground for a moment before lifting his head to her and saying, "I love her like I have never loved another person. She makes me this man I never thought I could be until she come into my life three months ago when I needed someone the most, but you wouldn't don't understand your left us all." 

She watched as he walked to the door she didn't want him going to Seth right now, but at the same time, Seth had a right to know. "How about you just wait to tell him, give him some time to let the fact that the one and only girl he has every loved left him for another man," Marissa said before she moved out of the doorway to let him out. She hoped that he made the right choice, but she couldn't force him to do anything. He looked into his eyes for the first time since they had ran into the hall way and she noticed that somewhere deep down he had really changed since they had broken up. 

----- 

AN: please review, in order for me to update I would like to have some reviews. let me know what you liked and what you didn't. And would you would like to see happen 


	2. drunkness

AN: Once again I do not own the OC if I did I would be not living in this small town with my parents. This chapter takes place the day after what was suppose to be the wedding. I hope you enjoy 

Also I'm surpised at the respond I got towards Summer and Ryan. I was going to ditch writing them by like chapter 4 but since so many of you like them together I will keep them going. 

Drunkness

As he walked into the kitchen of the beach house, he couldn't help put smile as he watched her try to figure out how to work the coffee pot. He stood in the door way watching as she tried to figure out just where to put the coffee grinds. As he watched her, he noticed just how cute she was first thing in the morning. He had never gotten the chance to actually spend the night with her before, and as much as he felt bad for ditching Seth last night when he needed him the most the fact of waking up with the girl of his dreams made all his worries drift away for this moment in time. He was brought back to Summer slamming down the coffee pot on the counter. He slowly walked up behind her and placed his arms around her waist. "Would you like me to show you?" He asked before he gentle kissed her on the neck. 

She turned her head towards him and said, "yes please," as she gentle leaned in for her morning kiss. "I thought I would surprise you this morning, but I guess I still have a lot to learn. I'm so used to having help, but daddy couldn't get someone out here for at least another week" 

"We have plenty of morning together so no need to rush it," Ryan said as he let go of her waist in order to show her how the coffee was made. It was just a simple coffee pot to him, but to her it was a step. A step that he thoughts she would never take, but she did this morning, and it proved to him that she meant it when she left Seth for her. As he showed her, step-by-step on how to make the coffee he noticed the look in her eyes that showed him she really did care about learning this stuff. As he hit the on button, he took one arm and pulled her in closer to him. "So you think tomorrow you can give that a try?" He asked as he gentle placed a kiss on her lips. He normally wasn't the type of guy to give little kisses, but something about Summer made every single inch of his body crave the little moments. 

"I think so Chino," she with a small little smile. 

He loved when she called him Chino it was a nickname that had stuck since they first met six years ago. Six years ago, he never thought he would be making coffee with her, but he was and wouldn't change it for the world. "You know we need to talk today," he said as he leaned against the counter and rested her body against his. 

"I know," she said as she rested her head on his chest. "Do we have to decided right now though?" 

"I think the sooner we tell him the better we will all feel," he said as he looked down at her. If he had it his way Seth would have known from day one, but he had allowed Summer to decided. Now he knew he had to face Seth at some point and wonder just how it would happen. 

"Can't we just keep it hidden for a while longer? Allow him to get over one thing before he finds out about us. I crushed his heart once I don't know if I can do it again." she said as she looked up at Ryan. 

"If you want I tell him" Ryan said as he wrapped his arms around her tighter then before. He had this need to keep her happy, but it wasn't like it was with Marissa. With Summer she made him so happy, that he felt the only thing he could do back to her was to make her happy. 

"Would you mind?" Summer asked as she looked up at him. 

"No, I played a role in this whole mess it's time I cleaned it up," Ryan said as he heard the coffee pot go off. "How about we have some breakfast then I will go find Seth." 

"Okay," Summer said as she pulled her body from him. "You do know I love you right?' She asked before moving out of his reach. 

"Yes, and I love you too," Ryan said as he gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead. 

------------ 

He walked into the house earlier then normal, but he was worried about his son. He had tried to call all though out the day, but he didn't get an answer. He had gone to pick Seth up at his apartment last night and found him with bottles of beers all around him, and an empty bottle of tequila sitting next to him. It had been against Seth's wish to come home, but he knew what was better for his son. Plus he needed some place he could watch him and make sure he didn't run away again. 

As Sandy checked though out the house for his son, he found him in the living room with bottles of beers all around him, and a half empty bottle of tequila on the table in front of him. As a parent, he wanted to take the bottle away from him. After watching what Kirsten had gone though just years before he knew this couldn't lead to anything good, but instead he just sat down on the couch next to his son. "Hey," he said. 

"Hey," Seth said back to his father as he reached over and took some tequila right from the bottle. "I'm one of the lucky guys out there in this world. This guy on TV," Seth said as he looked towards the TV. "His girlfriend dumped him because she started sleeping with his brother. That's one thing I never had to worry about. Ryan and Summer are so different that they could never even think about being together. Plus I mean Ryan he respects our friendship he wouldn't do that. Summer on the other hand I never thought that she would be one of the cheating types, but I guess I was wrong. I guess that all she was looking for was some young stud to fuck. Do you remember when I come to you to talk about sex?" Seth asked as he looked at his father. 

"Yes," Sandy said as he leaned back into the couch. He had a feeling this was going to be a long night, but his son needed him now more then anything. 

"Our first time well it didn't go so well, but I always felt that over the years we had really learned each other bodies. I thought I was the one who knew just how to make Summer tick. I guess I was wrong though I mean why else would she go off and sleep with someone else. I loved her I thought that could make it work though anything. I mean just looked at you and mom. You guys have one of the strongest marriages out there, and nothing could tear you guys apart. You guys really work at this I guess that was where I went wrong. I thought I was working at it, but I never really did." He reached over for the bottle of tequila and held it up taking a lot of tequila into his body before he went on. "I just feel like I wasted six years of my life. If she didn't love me then why wait around this long. I gave up the chance of a lifetime to be with her. I could have gone off to NYU with Marissa to study art, but no, I stayed here in order to be closer to Summer. Maybe I should have left with Marissa she seems to be so happy out on her own maybe I could be happy too. Maybe I wouldn't be in all this drama of the Newport society." 

Sandy watched his son as he went on about everything. As a parent, he always felt that his son should have packed his bags and went off to NYU. He knew it was his son's choice though, and now wasn't the time to rub it into his face he needed his father to just listen to him, and that was what he was doing. "Seth you are young you still have plenty of time in order to find where you belong in this life." 

"Yeah, but dad it's not like I have the chance now to go to NYU. I could have made some great contacts. I mean yeah I know I have a great job here, but I couldn't have had so much more experience. Something that I will never get back. It all because of her. I should have known that it wasn't going to last when she expected me to give up my dream so that she could stay her and go to fashion school." He looked at the TV for a moment as he picked up another beer. "I think I'm going to go upstairs." 

"Okay son, I come and check up on you later," Sandy said as he watched his son picked up the beer and tequila to bring up to his room. He was worried about him, but knew he wouldn't snap back at any moment. 

---------- 

As he walked into the Cohen's household he felt as if his life was about to come, crashing down on him, but he also knew that she was what he had to do. He had to tell Seth as hard as it might be he needed to know the truth. He hated lying to his brother, and knew as much as this would hurt he would respect himself a little more for coming clean about it. As he walked up to Seth's room after searching the rest of the house for him, he felt his heart stop as he stopped at the door to Seth's room. 

As he walked into the room he couldn't help but noticed that the room smelled of alcohol as he noticed beer cans all around the room. There had to be at least one and a half cases of beer just in his room alone not including the beer cans that he had noticed Sandy had tossed out down stairs. As he looked at Seth, he felt as though he had been the one to cause this and that he needed to do what he couldn't to help his brother. He looked around for the trashcan in order to pick up the mess. 

As he walked over to room, he opened the window to get some fresh air into the bedroom as he tossed all the cans into the trashcan. He noticed a bottle of tequila on the table next to his bed that had a ¼ of a bottle left. He picked it up putting the lid back on and placed it on the floor outside the bedroom door. He walked down the hall to the main bathroom where he found some water and Advil that would help cure the hang over Seth would be feeling in the morning. 

He placed the water and Advil on the nightstand next to Seth. As he stood there looking at his brother he felt like everything he had once known was for ever changed and he wonder if Seth would every forgive him for what he had done. 

"Ryan," Seth said as Ryan started to walk out of his room. Ryan turned around to look at Seth. "Thank you," Seth said before taking his head back under the covers. Ryan just walked out feeling bad for what he had done. He didn't know if he could tell Seth about Summer and him. 

--------- 

As she rang the doorbell for the Cohen's house part of her hoped that Seth would answer. She wanted to see for herself just how he was doing, but as the door open, she saw Kirsten on the other end. "Marissa long time," Kirsten said as she gave Marissa a hug. "What brings you here?" 

Marissa walked into the house before saying, "I wanted to make sure that Seth was okay?' 

"To be honest he's not doing well at all. I just went up to check on his he's past out up stairs," Kirsten said, "but if you have time I would like to talk." 

"I would love to," Marissa said as she followed her into the kitchen were she couldn't help but noticed the bag fill of beer bottles and can sitting in the corner. "Did he drink all that?" 

"Yes," was all that could come out of her mouth. "That's what I want to talk to you about. Do you think you could maybe take him out somewhere tomorrow?" 

"Actually that was why I was coming over there a band playing tomorrow I thought he might like to go see with me. I figure with everything he's been though he could use a night out with someone who isn't part of the drama," Marissa said she felt part of this was her fault the group changed after she had left four years ago, and part of her wondered what might had been if she stayed in Newport instead of going to NYU. 

"You know you been missed," Kirsten said. 

"I'm sure Ryan has moved on," she said as she looked out to the pool house. She hadn't thought of him in years, but seeing him yesterday she wonder just what had happen to him that made him change so much. 

"He did, but Seth has really missed you." 

"Really?" She couldn't believe that Seth had missed her. It wasn't as if they were close or anything. They would just go to concert together ones that they couldn't drag Summer or Ryan too. "Well I have to get going, but I stop by tomorrow morning to check on him." 

"Okay I let him know." 

----- 

AN please review and tell me what you thought. 


	3. pancakes

AN: Sorry for taking so long to write this, but I couldn't seem to get it out the way that I wanted to, and then with some personal issue in my life I choice to spend time with my mom rather then be on the computer. This chapter is a Seth/Marissa one with really no Ryan/Summer, but I promise next one they well have a part 

----- 

As she walked into Seth's room, she couldn't help but notice that he was still asleep. She looked over at the clock that read 6:45 in big red letters. She placed the bag and cup of coffee that she had been holding as she looked over at Seth's bed to find a bottle of water and some Advil left for him. She picked up the cup of coffee that she had picked up from Star Bucks down the road and hoped that he still liked Mocha like he did in high school. She moved over and sat down on his bed beside him. As she pulled the covers down off his face a bit she said, "Seth," before placing her free hand on his shoulder. She noticed his eyes slowly starting to open up. "Hey sleepy head," she said as she moved a little bit so he could sit up. 

"Nothing happen between us right?" Seth said as he looked under the covers. 

Marissa couldn't help but let a little laugh slip out of her mouth as Seth looked under the covers to make sure he wasn't naked. "Sorry, but nothing happen between you and me, but I did bring you a cup of coffee," she said as she handed him the cup. 

He sat up in bed so that his head was resting against the wall. "Marissa if I didn't know any better I would say you actually cared about me," Seth said with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. 

"Well Cohen, it might actually surprise you, but some people do care," she said playful as she got up and grabbed the bag that she had placed on the table. She took out the two concert tickets before she handed him the bag. "I was thinking how about you and me go out to a concert?" 

"I think for being left at the church I have it pretty good. I got woken up by one hot chick, and now she asking me out on a date," he said as he moved over a bit before Marissa could slap him. "What?" 

She couldn't help but let a smile out as she sat down on the end of the bed next to him. There was just something about being here with him like this. She knew that he was hurting over the fact of losing Summer, but at the same time, he still had ease around her. " For calling me a chick." 

"So whom are we going to see tonight?" he asked before he opened the bag. 

"Only one of the greatest band right now," she said as she moved back on the bed so that she could relax a little. 

"Felix sarco," Seth said as he sat up in bed and reached for the tickets. 

"Hey now," Marissa said as she lifted the tickets so he couldn't reach them. "Before you go you have to promise me something?" 

"Yeah," he asked as he pulled back a bit. 

"No drinking tonight." 

"I think I'm all done with alcohol." 

----- 

"I think we should get pancakes," Marissa said as she leaned back into the booth. They had made a promise not to drink, but somehow it had been broken. Now two hours later they were sitting in a Newport diner trying to debate what they wanted to eat. 

"Hey we should go on the pancake tour," Seth said as he closed the menu in front of him. He placed it on the table in front of him. He had no clue how this evening had brought him to this place in time, but he was for once happy with everything around him. Maybe it was then ten shots of tequila, and five beers that he had at the concert, or the bottle 151 that they had brought from some guy as they were leaving the club. He didn't even remember getting to this diner, but now that he was here he could go for some pancakes. 

"That would be fun, but I think you would enjoy Paris even more," Marissa said as she played with the napkin in front of her. "I spend a lot of my time there for work. I don't get to site see as much as I would love to, but it the most wonderful place. You can really grow as a person." 

'I think that's what I need. I need to find somewhere that I could grow and find who I am for me. Not who I am in Newport. Newport has really changed who I am over the years. I don't like being geeky boy, but now I'm forever going to be remember as the guy that Summer Roberts left," Seth said as he reached over the table and placed her menu on top of his. "It like every place I go here I have some kind of memory with her and it really hard to not feel hurt." 

"Well maybe what you need to do is just hop on a plane and spend some time in Paris. I'm sure everyone will understand," she said. 

-------- 

As they sat down on the beach neither one of them were in any state to drive home tonight, and neither one of them had any desire to go home at this point. They both had nothing to go back to at this point, and didn't want the night ending just yet. Even though it was already four in the morning neither one of them felt it was late at all. She leaned her body in closer to his needing something steady in order to keep the world from spinning. She gentle placed her head on his shoulder as she said, "I missed this." 

"Missed what?" Seth said as he placed an arm around her shoulder. 

"I just missed spending time like this. My life is so hectic that sometime I just forget what it's like to have fun. You know I can't tell you the last time I went to a concert and got this wasted," Marissa said as she turned her head up to face him. "I know tonight was suppose to help you out, but it helped me too." 

"See Marissa that is why I love this," He said as his hand pointed between the two of them. "Because we help each other out. We have always been there for one another in a way that most people can't explain. It's like we just get one another with out needing to say or do much of anything." 

"Do you think things would have been different if you came to NYU with me?" Marissa asked as she felt her body shift so that she was closer to Seth. 

"Yes, I think life would be something so different then what I have now. I really think Summer and me wouldn't be together, I think you and me might have explored being together, and I think we would be very happy with our life. I'm not sure if we would be together now, but we would be very close," he said. 

"Cohen, are you trying to tell me something?" She asked as she lifted her head off his shoulder a bit. She had to admit being with him today made her wonder what if they had gone to NYU together. She had never told a single person, but part of the reason she had gone to NYU was because Seth was going. She wanted to explore what could happen between the two of them when they weren't around the Newport drama. 

"Yes," he said as she shifted his body so that his face was only inches from hers. "I find you very sexy, and have always had a school boy crush on you," he said as he leaned in and gentle kissed her lips. 

She was surprised when his lips touched her but the moment that they did she felt herself kissing him back. She wrapped her arms around her neck as they deepen the kiss. Neither one of them sure what was going on, but at that moment in time, they didn't care. They had each other and that was all that matter. As she gentle started to allow her body to fall back into the sand she let out a soft moan as he start to explore her body with his hands. If she had known how great of a kisser he was, she would have done it years ago. The way that he moved his hands around her body to explore along with the deepen kisses she couldn't help but feel turned on by it. 

As they laid on the beach exploring each other body neither one of them, thinking about what this might lead too. She gentle found herself kissing his ear lobe as she whispered, "Is this okay?" He let out a soft moan as he pressed his body in closer to her allowing her to feel how certain he was about the next step. 

As they explored each other body and reached a new level in their friendship. Neither one of them had known the other felt like this. As she lay there on the beach with him on top of her, she felt her mind wondering if she was doing the right thing. She knew he was hurt over losing Summer, and didn't want the first time to be like this, but as he slowly brought her to her climax she didn't care about how they gotten to this point just that they did. She found his lips as she deepened the kiss as their bodies rocked together on the beach. Neither one of them ready to let go of this moment knowing that once they did everything would change between them. 

As he slept on the beach, she sat there wondering how in the world they had reached this point. She wasn't going to hide the fact that he had been great, but there was so much going on in his life that she knew it was the wrong thing to do. She picked up her clothes throwing on her jacket before heading back to the car. She felt bad leaving him there, but she couldn't face him just yet. They had made a mistake, and she wondered if they could work, pass it. 

--------- 

As he walked down the beach towards Ryan's work he wondered just how in the world he had even gotten here this morning. The last thing that he remembered was the diner with Marissa. After that there was no memory expect when he woke up alone, half naked, and feeling like someone had beaten him up last night. He had looked around for either his car or Marissa car but found nothing so he decided to walk down the beach towards Ryan's office. 

When he reached Ryan's office, he noticed Summer's car in the parking lot. He stopped to look at it. There were so many memories built into this car. The time they had drove up north for a weekend away from Newport, or the time they had gotten so wasted at a college party that they passed out in the backseat together. He brushed his hand against the car door wanting so bad just to hope in the car with her and forget all about what had happen. They could make it work he knew it they just needed to talk. 

He started to walk into the office when he heard, "But I love you." He knew that voice better then anyone. He walked around the corner of the building as he heard. "I know he's going to be hurt, but what are we suppose to do. We love each other… Don't we?" Summer said. 

Seth didn't even need to say a word when he walked around the corner to find Summer wrapped up in Ryan's arm as they looked out over the ocean. He felt as if he was about to puke as he watched his brother say, "I love you more then anyone could know." He couldn't stand the thought of seeing this for another moment. He turned around before either on knew that he was there, and started running as fast as he could. He didn't know where he was going, but he was getting 

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AN: I hope you guys have enjoyed it please send me a review. The more reviews I get the faster I get this out. Also the next chapter well set up for the rest of the fanfic 


	4. changes

AN: I'm not one to beg for views but this story has like over 780 hits, but only 28 reviews. I would really like more feedback on this fanfic then I've been getting. I really enjoy writing this fanfic, but I so would love some more feedback. PLEASE

Also this chapter is pretty long, but it has a bit of everything in it. I also wrote a Summer/Ryan act down towards the end. I pretty much have the Seth/Marissa story line played out in my head now I just need to play around with the idea of Summer/Ryan any input I would love

The only thing I own in this story is the idea, and Sam. Everything else is own by Josh, and if I did own it the OC would be one very different story

So please enjoy

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She laid back on the couch with all the old photos on the table, floor, and couch beside her. As she leaned back, she placed her hand on her stomach. She hadn't gain much weight in the past six months, but the doctor told her not to worry some women didn't put on a lot of weight while going though a pregnancy. He asked her if she had been eating healthy, getting enough exercise, and plenty of sleep. One thing she wasn't getting was enough sleep with everything going on in her life she found it hard to sleep. Even on nights like tonight when she was able to stay home and relax her mind was going a mile a minute with thoughts.

Thoughts about Seth, about her life after the baby, about telling the Cohen's that she were about to have their first grandchild. She thought about how to tell Seth that he was about to have a son. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell Seth about the baby it just she never could reach him, and didn't think it right to leave a message on his cell phone. 'Hey Seth, it's me Marissa just wanted to let you know that night we got totally wasted got me pregnant.' How in the world was she supposed to even tell him something like that?

She reached over to the table and picked up a picture that she had been starring at for the past twenty minutes. She was trying to think back to when it was taken, she was brought back to a simple time when the word drama didn't even matter to either one of them. They couldn't be anymore then three years old in this picture, but she knew it was the two of them. They were in the back yard of the Cohen's household, and they had fallen a sleep together on a lounge chair, Cohen laying on the right side facing her and her facing Cohen. Cohen she wasn't sure how she had started to call him that, but it fit. She had hated when Summer did it, but what was she suppose to say to her best friend. Actually right about now she was the last person she had wanted to speak too. Actually, add Ryan to that list too.

Since she had been back in New York City she hadn't heard one word from them, and she really didn't have a desire to even see them. They had hurt the one person she cared about more than anything. She didn't think that she loved Seth, but Seth was a good friend of hers. Maybe not her best friend, but someone who over time could become her best friend. She picked up another picture from the pile. This time it was on her, Sandy, Kirsten, and Seth it had been taken when she found out that her and Seth both got into NYU together. It was a moment of joy for her. It meant she wouldn't be alone, and her and Seth could actually build a solid friendship without the drama of Newport. However, her planned changed as soon as Seth and Summer got into a fight about him leaving her, and he decided to stay. She knew that she couldn't stay in Newport for the rest of her life so she went off to NYU alone.

Now almost five years later she was in New York City alone, six months pregnant, and no one to turn too. She didn't mind going though the pregnancy alone. Many women in the world did it so why couldn't she. She didn't need a man in her life, but she wasn't going to lie to herself she wished that Seth could be here with her. She wanted nothing more than to just be with him though all these moments. She wished that Sandy and Kirsten could be here to help her though it. She wondered what kind of advice Kirsten would give her about being a mom, and what kind of stories Sandy would share about what happened as they were raising Seth. She wondered what kind of traits Seth would have as a father, and if he got them from Sandy.

She looked at the clock on the wall before she picked up her phone to make sure it wasn't to late to make this call. As she dialed the number, she couldn't help my smile. "Hello," a woman said on the other end.

"Kirsten, it's me Marissa," she said.

"Marissa it's great to hear from you. How have you been?"

"That's why I was calling. I'm going to be in Newport for a few days I was wondering if I could maybe stay with you since my mom is out of town."

"Sure, what time is your flight coming in?"

"Seven tomorrow morning, can you be there or would you like me to take a taxi?"

"I will be there," Kirsten said.

"Thanks," Marissa said.

------

He placed his bagel and coffee on the table before taking out his sketchbook. As he sat down at his spot in Café Beaubourg, he couldn't help but let out a small smile. Life had changed for the better since he moved to Paris six months ago. It wasn't suppose to be a long term event, but after living in the hotel for two weeks he couldn't picture himself living anywhere else. He pulled out his sketchpad looking at the past few drawings that he had finished. He was trying to creative a new story line for his comic book, and come across the idea of Little Miss Vixen and Kid Chino turning into villains that the Ironist, and his new super hero has to fight off along with Cosmo girl.

Seth wasn't sure how this new super hero would fit into the picture, or even if she was meant to stay in the story for more then a few issues before sending her off. He sat back in his chair drawing her face. Drawing her face had become a piece of cake for him the last few weeks considering that they had spent every single waking moment together for the past five weeks. He knew it wasn't love it wasn't even lust if anything it was a attempt to get over his first love, but it wasn't to say he didn't enjoy the time spent with her.

He closed his pad in front of him as he felt someone start to walk up behind him. "How come I never get to see your work?' The voice asked as she sat down across from him.

"I don't allow anyone to see my unfinished work," he said. To him this was to personal to just let anyone into it.

"Okay I give you the right to that. I know many artiest that refuse to show their work until it is done to the level they feel is right. So I was thinking if you didn't have any work to do this afternoon we could hang out, and have a picnic at Place Des Vosges," she said as she reached over and took his cup of coffee.

"Actually, I think I could use a break from work," he said as he watched her take a sip of his coffee as she start to place it down on the table he reached from it. "How about we make a whole day of it?"

"That's a great idea, I haven't spent a whole day there since we start to come to Paris when I was five," she said as she leaned back into her chair.

He took a sip of coffee before saying, "I wish I had that chance growing up, Sam. No one was really into the whole Paris thing. Well expect a friend of mine Marissa Cooper," Seth said before he took a bit of his bagel.

"What the Marissa Cooper? The most fought after fashion designer in Paris and New York," Sam said as she sat straight up in her chair.

"The one and only," Seth said. It had been six months since he talked her last. He had tried calling a few times when he noticed her number on his cell phone but could never seem to get though to her. Out of everyone from Newport, she was the one person he wanted to stay in touch with.

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"I'm sorry, but I have to take another rain check on dinner tonight this new client of mine is keeping me busy," Ryan said as he walked out of his office. He hated lying Kirsten, but he didn't think the truth should be known yet.

"It's just I feel like since Seth left we haven't gotten together. I understand you are busy and all, but can't you at least stop by for a little while tonight?" Kirsten asked.

He hated when she did this to him. He wanted nothing more then to spend an evening with them like old time, but now things had changed too much to go back to normal. "I try," he said as he got into his car. "But I should get going I told them I would stop by with the basic ideas for their new house." Another lie to add to the list. He hated it more then ever, but there was no choice in the matter.

"Okay, but just try and stop by tonight," she said.

"I will," he said before hanging up the phone.

He hated when he had to lie to Kirsten about what he was doing but tonight was his and Summer nine-month anniversary and he couldn't miss it for anything. He had everything planned for tonight. He had wished that he could have gotten his family input on the evening or even Seth's thought, but now everything had changed. He pulled up to his apartment as he got out of the car he looked at the back seat it was a mess between work, Summer place, and his own his back seat had become his fourth home everything he needed could be found back there. He found a bag and starting picking up all the trash that had been tossed back. He then folded all his clothes into a nice neat pile, and grabbed the four pairs of shoes that had also been thrown back there. He placed the shoes in the trunk, and the clothes would go in with him . He tossed the trash into the dump on the side of the apartment before heading up stairs to his tiny one bedroom apartment that over looked the ocean.

As he entered the apartment, he looked around to see what he needed to clean up before Summer came over. Some how it had stayed pretty clean, and he figured it had to do with the fact that he spent most of his time at Summer's beach house. He placed his clothes in the basket before heading to the kitchen to start cooking dinner for them tonight. Nothing fancy just something he had found the other day Fettuccine with Heavenly Salmon Sauce. He had been dying to try it one night, but wanted to wait for something special. As he got everything sliced, and ready to be thrown into the frying pan. He went and got ready to take a shower.

As he finished up with everything, he heard a knock on the door to the apartment he had told Summer to knock tonight. As he walked into the living room he stopped to light some candles on the way and hit the CD player with a mix that they had made together a few months again. He stopped at the door and took one more look around the apartment before opening the door for her. As he did, his breath was taken away by how wonderful she looked tonight. "Hi," was all that could escape his mouth as he looked at her in wonder. He took a step closer to him as he leaned in for a kiss. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips as he placed his arm around his waist. He pulled away leading her into his apartment.

He watched as she looked around the apartment taking everything in, the candles, the music, and the dinner just about done in the kitchen. "Everything is wonderful," she said as she placed another kiss on his lips. "I can't believe you did this for me."

"If I had it my way I would have taken you away to Napa Valley for the weekend, but I thought you might enjoy this a little more," he said before he started to walk into the kitchen.

"I think this is better," she said as she followed him into the kitchen. "Much better then the last time I tried to cook." she said with a small laugh as she leaned against the counter.

"Yeah I don't plan on having any firemen over tonight," he said with a small laugh. "Even though I know you enjoyed looking at them."

"Hey we never said anything about looking," she said with a tease. "Plus why would I want them when I have you."

He leaned in for a kiss as he was taken back on just how at ease they felt around each other. Around Summer, he didn't worry about everything going on around them. He didn't worry about Seth or the Cohen's. The only thing that matter to him more than anything was the woman in his arms at this moment. "Who else would put up with your cooking?" he said playful before he went back to cooking his own dinner.

"I'm sure I could find someone," she said playful. "Do you have any wine?"

"Yeah in the fridge."

She walked over to the fridge and pulled out the bottle of wine before getting two wine glasses down. She poured the wine before she handed him a glass. "To a wonderful evening," she said as she toasted the two of them.

"To a wonderful evening" he said back as he took a sip of his wine.

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She was glad that when Kirsten picked her up from the airport that morning that she didn't ask questions when she noticed that Marissa was pregnant. She had tired to hide the fact, but it could be seen. It wasn't like she was big or anything, but people noticed. She laid on the couch in the living room just looking at the home that she once felt so welcome into. Even now almost five years after the fact she still felt that this was somewhere she was more then welcome in. She wanted to talk to Kirsten about being a mom. She needed some advice on the whole thing, but she wasn't sure how to bring up the whole fact. She felt someone sit on the other end of the couch as she leaned her head back a bit. "So how far along are you?' Kirsten asked as she looked at Marissa.

"Six months," was all that she could stay at first before she looked at the women sitting across from her. "What is it like being a mom?" she asked.

"Being a mom is one of the most wonderful events in a women life. I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with Seth. I couldn't have been happier at that given moment. It just felt so right to have a little growing baby inside of me. Sure the morning sickness, craving, and back pain weren't the greatest, but it well worth it when you see your baby for the first time. How have you been feeling?"

"Truthful from what I have heard, and read about I'm having a pretty ease one. I didn't have much morning sickness besides like the first three months, craving having been that weird well expect if you count my pickles and spinach mix that I have a huge jar made of every week, and as for pain I guess because I haven't feel gained a lot of weight for it's not all that bad," Marissa said as she looked at Kirsten. "How was it the first time you held Seth?"

"It was a moment that I would never forget I was so scared, so happy, and just filled with so many different emotions. I didn't want to let him go. It was like I was holding this piece of me that now was about to go into this world and I had to do everything I could to protect him. I remember just looking for Seth to Sandy and back and forth I had the two most important guys in my life, and I couldn't image my life without them in it."

Marissa just looked down as she talked about what it was like to have Sandy next to her. She didn't know if Seth would get to be here for that moment. She wanted nothing more than to have Seth be part of everything. He had already missed so much of this, and now she wondered if she would every get the chance to tell him.

"Has the father been part of this?" Kirsten asked as she moved closer to Marissa.

Marissa felt a lump in her throat grow when Kirsten asked about the father. "No," was all that she was able to get out. "I haven't been able to get in touch since that night."

"Oh Marissa," she said as she pulled her in for a hug. "I wish I have known I would have been here for you."

"I know, but maybe you can help me now," she said as she looked at Kirsten. She didn't know how to say it. How was she supposed to tell her that she was carrying her first grand child?

"Anything," she said as she looked at Marissa.

"I really don't know how to say this so I'm just going to come out. I was wondering if you could tell me where I could find Seth. I haven't been able to reach him since I saw him last six months ago," she said hoping to god that was enough. She didn't want to come out and say it.

She watched at Kirsten just sat there for a moment trying to figure it all out. "You mean," she paused for a moment. "I'm going to be a grandma." She hugged Marissa so tight. She placed her hand on Marissa belly as she looked at her. "I can't believe this. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

For the first time Marissa felt so relax as she sat here with Kirsten. "Because I was scared," she said as she looked at Kirsten. "But now I'm glad I told you, but it would be helpful if I could have an address for Seth, I really need to go see him."

She watched as Kirsten got up and went to the desk where she had noticed some mail. "I'm pretty sure this is his address," she said as she picked up a post card. "I hope it helps"

Marissa just looked at the address she had an idea where the apartment was. It was close to her store in Paris.

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I know you guys are reading it so there for I would like to see some reviews. If you review the next chapter might just be even better.


	5. truth comes out

AN: Sorry for the delay guys, but my mom is really sick so I've been helping out around the house more then being on the computer. Also you should thank delise for updating her fanfic and giving me my much needed push to get working on this fanfic. 

There is one more chapter after this that will kind of close the first half of this fanfic and open up to the drama that is just about to come. I would like to thank all of your who review this story. It has taken a whole new turn then what I started it out as, but I hope you guys have enjoyed it. 

She hadn't been here in months but still Café Beaubourg had a special feel about it. It was the one place she could be at ease with herself no matter how stressful her life had gotten. She used to come here during the middle of the day when life in the office got to complex for her to handle. Sometime she just couldn't handle the drama of life anymore and just needed to find her a small slice of heaven for a while. That was when she found this place. It was just the place she needed so she could focus on her work. 

Now though she wasn't here for work instead she needed to find away to clear her mind. She had talked herself out of going to see Seth this morning telling herself it was to early and he might be a sleep, and that she would stop by this afternoon when she was sure he would be around; however, even now sitting her at nine in the morning she was already coming up with reason to not see him tonight. She knew they were all dumb reason, and that she would have to face him eventually. It was just easier to forget about it for a while. She couldn't really forget about it though as she felt her unborn baby kicking inside of her. She placed her hand on her stomach still amazed at how wonderful it felt to have something growing inside of her. At first, she had been scared, but now with only three months to go, she was excited about having this baby. 

"What a surprise Marissa Cooper sitting at my table," she heard in a familiar voice behind her. As she turned around he said, "Wow." 

A small laugh escape her mouth as she watched him rub his eyes is disbelief of what he had just seen. She remembered that look well from the night he found out about her and Alex, and let a small smile cross her face. "Is that all I get Cohen?" she asked with a grin on her face. 

He stepped in closer to her and leaned down for a hug. "It's been to long," he whispered in her ear before he pulled away. 

'You have no idea,' she thought to herself as she watched him take the seat across from her. He looked so at ease with himself that it was almost like she was looking at a different man in front of here. "You look good Seth," she said as she leaned back into the chair. "Paris has really been good for you." 

"Thanks," he said. "So when are you due?" 

She knew it would come up, but she was hoping that they could have some of the playful banter that she loved before she had to tell him. "March 15," she said as she placed her hand on her belly. It was a habit she had gotten into lately. Her therapist had told it in a way she was trying to protect her baby from any harm when she was in a stressful moment, and this was one of them. 

His eyes widen for a moment as he thought for a moment, and she knew what was coming next. She wanted him to say it though maybe it would be easier then her saying it. "That means you are six months along," he said before he paused for a moment. "That night we gotten drunk did anything happen between us?" he asked as he looked down at Marissa stomach. 

How in the world was she supposed to tell him now? She knew he would get upset she could tell in the sound of his voice, and the way he looked at her. She had to tell him though. "Yes," was all that she could get out of her mouth. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" he said with a little anger in his voice. 

She knew that he would be upset, and now she would have to deal with it. "Because I was scared. Summer had just left you and I knew that you were heart broken so I picked my things up and got the first flight back to Paris that I could get. A month later I was back in NYC sitting in the doctor office and found out I was pregnant. I tried calling you a few times, but I didn't get any answers. After a while, I just figured you didn't want to talk to me so I gave up, and decided to raise this baby alone. I went back to Newport though this weekend and stayed with your family, and I realized I needed to tell them so I did. Your mom was so excited about being a grandma you wouldn't have believed it she was so beaming with joy as we talked about the baby, but Seth I had to come and tell you. I wanted you to know that you were going to be a daddy." 

She watched as he sat there for a moment she saw all the emotions run though him, and couldn't understand just what he was feeling. "I'm hurt that you went six months without telling me that I was a father. You could have left a message or something on my phone. I had tried to call you a few times, but I could never get though. Sure I was still in love with Summer, but I would have been here for you though all this. I would have wanted to be there for my baby. But Marissa I need some time to think about this. How long are you going to be in Paris for?" 

"My plane leaves at 3:00 on Tuesday afternoon," she said as she looked down at her stomach. "I was only able to get a few days off work." 

"Okay well I get in touch," he said as he got up from the table. 

She watched as he walked away. She knew he had every right to be mad, but it still hurt deep inside her. 

He sat on the cliff that over looked some of the Newport finest surfers he let a small chuckle escape his lips as he thought about the time that Sandy had tried to get him to surf. It wasn't all bad he had given some of the by standers a good laugh as he tried to catch the waves, but in his mind it was always the bond that was former between him and Sandy during those weeks. Sandy had always been a father figure to him, but those few days he become a dad. A dad that he could really count on, more then his real father had every been to him, and now four years after the fact he was scared that he might lose that bond between him. 

"Hey kid," Ryan heard Sandy say as he turned around to face the man who sat down beside him. "Kirsten has been worried about you." 

"I know," he said as he looked out at the ocean. Part of Ryan wished that he could be as open with Sandy as he was with Summer, but even though the shared a deep bond he still liked to hide between his feeling in front of him. 

"Did you know Marissa was in town this weekend?" Sandy asked as he looked over at Ryan. 

"No, haven't see her since the wedding," Ryan said as he looked up at Sandy. 

"She had really changed a lot over these six months. She came here to sort some stuff out and try to find Seth. Something about needing to tell him something Kirsten wouldn't tell me much, but I think it has something to do with the fact that Marissa is six months pregnant, and Kirsten been baby shopping." 

"What?" Ryan asked as he looked at Sandy. Marissa was six months pregnant, and looking for Seth. It had crossed his mind a few times back in high school that maybe Seth and Marissa should be together. They had more in common then Marissa and him ever did, and there was the fact that he noticed he could make her smile at the worst of time. He always somewhat just placed it in the back of his mind though. He never actually thought Seth would do anything with Marissa. 

"I'm not sure of the whole detail, but I have never seen Kirsten so happy as when she come back from the mall with five bags of baby supplies. Every thing form clothes to toys could be found," Sandy said. 

"You know Kirsten she is most likely just excited about the fact of having a baby in her life to enjoy," Ryan said as he looked out at the ocean. He had wanted to tell Sandy about him and Summer today, but with the news that there was a chance that he could be a grandfather, he didn't know if this was the right time. Maybe though there was never going to be a right time for this. 

"Hey, is there something you need to talk about?" Sandy asked as he placed her hand on Ryan's shoulder. 

Ryan wanted to scream yes. He knew that he needed to get this off his chest, but there was something that stopped him once again. There was always something in the way, and he started to wonder if him and Summer were actually meant to be together. "No, just that I was wondering if you and Kirsten wanted to have dinner at my place tonight?" 

"I'm sure that would be fine, but I just have to give Kirsten a call later. How about I call your office around lunch?" 

"That be great," Ryan said as he looked from Sandy to the ocean. Maybe he would be able to tell them over dinner tonight. 

Just seven hours until her plane, left and he couldn't decide what he wanted right now from her. He leaned back into the nice soft couch as he tried to figure out just what he wanted from life at this moment. He wasn't going to lie before Marissa had told him about being a father becoming a father was the last thing in his mind that this moment. He enjoyed nothing more then the fling that he was having with Sam at this moment. It didn't mean anything, nor did he want it to. He just found her good looking, fun to be around and someone that he could enjoy spending time with in Paris. 

Now though everything had changed for him. He could let Marissa leave on that plane without getting to know his child. He could be the type of father who just sent money to help out, but never actually be part of his or her life. Marissa would make a great mom there was no doubt in his mind about that, and there was no use in hiding the fact that he would enjoy having her around. Out of everyone from Newport besides his parents, she was the one person he really missed being her in Paris. 

He reached out from his drawing pad looking though the last few pages he couldn't help but smile. He had drawn picture of what he thought his and Marissa child might look like. What if it was a girl? How about a boy? He thought about what he would want more if he did become part of the baby life, and he come to an understanding he wanted a boy more than anything. 

However, it didn't help the fact that he was still upset with Marissa. Sure they had been drunk that night on the beach, and he didn't remember it at all, but he still would have been there for Marissa though this all. He would have flown to New York to be with her. He would have helped her though it all, but now six months after he just started to get back on his feet from losing Summer to Ryan she had to thrown this on top of him. He felt like no one wanted to tell him the truth like that, if they told him the truth it would break him, but he was stronger then most people thought he was. 

As the phone started to ring he reached over and grabbed it as he put the finishes touches on one of his drawing, "Hello," he said as he cradle the phone against his shoulder so he could draw. 

"Hey, just wanted to call to see how you were doing?" 

"Been better mom," he said thankful he had someone to talk to. 

"Do you want to talk?" 

"I don't know anymore mom what I want. It feels like everything I do I end up getting hurt. First Summer and now Marissa." 

"Seth, I know it's hard, but you have to look at it from Marissa point of view. It wasn't as if the two of you were best friends or anything at that moment. She knew that you were hurting, and didn't want to hurt you anymore." 

"But mom she did. How am I suppose to trust her to tell me about things if she couldn't tell me that I was going to be a father?" 

"Seth, listen to yourself. Marissa is one of the most honest people when it comes to being with you. She will do anything to make you happy even if that means she has to be unhappy. I'm not going to tell you that I think you will have the perfect life with her, but I think if you are willing to work at it the two of you could be very happy together." 

"I don't know if I can love her like dad loves you though mom. If I am part of this baby life I want to know that some other guy isn't going to come and sweep Marissa off her feet, and take over where I'm suppose to me. I want to be both a father to my baby, and a husband to the women of my child. I just don't know if I can do that with Marissa." 

"Listen son you don't have to make that choice right this moment. Right this moment you just need to make the choice if you want to be part of the baby life, but from a mother point of view I think you would be a great dad. Being a father is going to teach you so much about life. It will teach both you and Marissa so much about life." 

He sat there for a moment taking everything in that his mom was telling him. He had been drawing as he listen to him mom and when he looked down at the paper in front of him he noticed he had drawn Marissa, himself, and their soon to be child. "Thanks for talking mom, but I have to go do something before I miss my chance," Seth said as he got up off the couch. 

"Okay Seth, good lucky," he heard his mom say before he hung up the phone. 

As he opened the door to the apartment she stepped in without a word after the day that she just had she couldn't wait for words. She found her lips against him as she kissed him deeply telling him just how much she needed him now more than anything. After a moment, she placed his hands on his chest and started to undo the buttons to his shirt. She undid them as fast as she could as she placed her hands against his bare skin. She started to gentle rub her fingers across his abs as she let out a small moan. God how she loved the six-pack he had. 

She helped him to take it off as she pressed her body against his. There was nothing she loved more in this world then the feel of their two bodies pressed so tightly together. They start to head towards the bedroom as she felt his hand on her waist gentle bring her shirt up over her body. His hand gentle rubbing over a few of her most sensitive areas of her body She let a few soft moans escape her mouth as they part for a moment to pull the shirt over her head. He lowered his lips to just below her right earlobe and gentle sucked on it. She let out a load moan as he did so. She felt him slowly undoing her bra in the back as she caressed his body and gentle running a hand though his short dirty blond hair 

As they enter the room he slipped of her bra she felt his hands gentle pressed against her breast she pressed her body against his as she heard a low moan escape from his mouth as she felt him manhood against her body. She moved her hands slowly downed his body as she gentle unbutton his pants. She slowly unzipped his pants and she moved back up grabbing both his boxers and pants and slowly moving them down. She loved the way his body tensed him she knew he wanted her to move faster, but she loved to tease him just a bit. She felt him slowly doing the same to her and soon they were naked in front of each other. 

They fell back onto the bed as they kissed each other exploring each other bodies. Finding new ways to make there partner moan out in passions as they made love to one another. Her body just collapse in bed after the way done between the stress of work, keeping this a secret, and the fact that Ryan knew how to turn her on in every possible way. She slowly closed her eyes and feel into a gentle sleep with him still inside of her. 

She was brought of her sleep by the sound of the doorbell going off in the background. At first, she had thought it was a dream, but she heard it again just before Ryan yelled from the shower. "Sum can you get that?" 

She grabbed the closest thing to her, which was a blanket from the bed she wrapped it around her body as it trailed behind her. She let out a small yawn as she opened the door. The only words that could escape her mouth were "Oh my god" in a fast motion. She heard the shower stop and the door open. She looked back in hopes that Ryan would come to her help. 

"Sandy… Kirsten," Ryan said as he walked towards the door in just a towel. 

Well I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Will Seth sweep Marissa off her feet in time? What will Sandy and Kirsten say about Ryan amd Summer? Can the gang find it's way back to each other? Next chapter will answer a few of those question, and bring more drama into the picture. Pleasee review 


	6. A new life

AN: I would like to say thank you for the reviews that I have gotten for this fanfic. Mr Destiny I would just let to say thank you for your long review. I can't promise that Ryan and Summer won't end up together down the road, but I can promise you that Kirsten and Sandy will not support them, and that they won't have it easy now. 

For the rest of you thank for taking the time to review I promise there will be more drama to come, and that life isn't going to be easier for the fab four. Also I would like to say I don't own the OC because if I did things would be different. 

He wasn�t in love with her, but there was a connection he had always felt for her. Now that they were having, a baby together there was a deeper connection that he felt towards her. She was carrying his first child and as much as he wasn�t ready to be a father he wasn�t going to lie, he was excited to see how things turned out for him or her. He ran down the terminal towards gate 15 as he was reminded with just how little time he had "flight 220 to New York City is now boarding at gate 15" boomed over the loud speaker. He was far from athletic, but he picked up the pace dodging people left and right as he bolted down the terminal. 

As he reached gate 15 he looked around searching for the one face he wanted to see the most. Un able to find her in the crowd he found an empty seat and jumped up on it. "Marissa Cooper," he yelled as he searched the crowd again for her. "Marissa Cooper," He said again as he noticed her pushing though the crowd towards him. 

"Marissa, I know that we don�t have the most perfect life around us right now, and I know you wanted nothing more then to get away from the Newport drama that we dealt with our whole life. I agree with that, Newport drama is something that no one should deal with. Somehow though after four years of you finding your own way in this world you come back to my wedding. A day that be both thought was suppose to be a happy drama free day, but it wasn�t. Marissa you were the only person besides my parents who stood by my side though it, and look how I repay you. I know that we didn�t mean for that night to happen, but it did. Now we both need to be adult about this. I know how I reacted the other day in the caf� wasn�t very adult. I was just surprised about it." He stopped for a moment to look at her. "Marissa I don�t know if I have feeling for you, but I do knew that you are a person who could become my best friend. I think if we both respect each other, we could raise our child together. " He jumped down off the chair and walked over to her. He placed his hand on her stomach as he said. "I would like for you to stay for a day so we could talk, and then I be more then happy to come to New York with you." 

He watched her for a moment wondering what was going on in her mind. He hoped that she agreed with him. "I would like that," She said as she placed her arm around his neck. 

It was just a simple hug, but as he pulled away from her, he wondered just what his future would bring. "So how about we go back to my apartment, and I make you some pancakes?" He asked as they started to walk away from the gate. 

"I don�t know how safe I feel feeding our baby pancakes that you made." 

"I�m hurt, do you really think I would feed my son something harmful?" 

"And how do you know it�s going to be a boy?" "Because it is in the Cohen�s genes to have the first born be a son." 

"Well I hate to burst your bubble, but I have a feeling it�s going to be a girl." 

Seth gentle slipped his head around his waist as they walked though the parking lot. He helped guide her to the car as he said, "Well Cooper I guess we just need to visit the doctor when we get back in town." 

"Nope Cohen, we are doing the old fashion way of not knowing." 

"How is my mom suppose to shop for this baby then?" He asked as he opened the car door for her. 

"There ways to do it," she said playfully before he shut the door. 

"Well I plan on a boy, and you can plan on a girl and we see who is right," Seth said as he got in to the car. 

"Me," she said as she looked from him to outside her window. 

"What the hell is going on?" Kirsten asked as she walked though the door to Ryan�s apartment. She looked right from Summer to Ryan before she went on. "If this is the reason by son has been hurting I swear both of you will pay." 

"Kirsten� I� I can explain," Ryan, said trying to find the words he looked at Summer before he looked at Kirsten truth be told he didn�t have a clue on how to start this. He hoped it would come out nice and easy. "We didn�t mean for this to happen." He said as he looked at her. 

"Then how did it happen? Because Ryan, Seth is your brother the one person in this whole world that you should respect. You should never have went against him," Kirsten said as he looked at Ryan. She then moved her eyes over to Summer. "And you� You were Seth�s world he would have done anything to make you happy. All Seth could talk about was giving you everything that you wanted, but no, you had to go and tear his heart apart. Now he is living thousands of miles for us with no plans on every coming back. 

He watched as Summer looked down at the ground, and gentle pull up the blanket around her. He wanted nothing more then to wrapped his arms around her to make her feel stronger, but he knew it was the wrong time. He looked over at Sandy who hadn�t said a word to either one of them, but he had yet to stop his wife from yelling at him. Ryan just looked into his eyes and he knew that everything he had worked towards over the past seven years had come crashing down in this one moment. "I�m sorry," was all that he could get out at that moment. 

"Is that all that you can say?" Sandy asked as he stepped closer to Ryan. "I took you into my house, and allowed you to become a son to me. I allowed you to be part of the one person in my life that I would give everything and you tear his heart out. You take the one thing that he wanted more than anything out of in this life. How am I to every allow you back into our house after that?" Sandy asked as he felt his wife had on his back. 

"Don�t blame Ryan," Summer said for the first time able to speak. "This wasn�t just Ryan�s fault. I was the one who feel in love with him. He wanted to tell you guys all along about us. He wanted to let Seth know before the wedding, but until the night before the wedding, I didn�t know who I loved. I was still in love with Seth. I will always be in love with Seth, but the kind of love I feel for Seth isn�t the love that I want for the rest of my life. I want a love that allows me to grow as a person. I am able to do that with Ryan. We have only been together for nine months, but we have grown so much together. I love Ryan, and I hope that one day you are able to let the both of us back into your life. I would hate for you to miss out on watching Ryan grow into this amazing person." 

He watched as Summer spoke about there love. He wanted nothing more to just hug her at that moment, but instead he walked closer to her and placed his hand on the small of her back letting her know just how much he supported her at this moment. 

"I don�t know if I can every allow the two of you back into our life. You hurt the one person that we both care very deeply about. The one person we would give anything to if it made him happy. I can�t believe that the two of you would hurt him," Kirsten said. As she finished, she started to walk out of the door. "I don�t want to see the two of you at our house every again," she said as she walked out of the apartment. 

Ryan looked at Sandy hoping that somewhere deep down he would forgive him, but as the world. "I have to support my wife," come out of his mouth Ryan knew that his life was forever changed at this moment. He watched as Sandy walked out ofthis apartment. Before he pulled Summer into a hug. He was used to being alone, but he didn�t know how she would handle it. "It will be okay we have each other," he said. 

"I know, I just didn�t expect them to be so hurt," she said as he looked up at him. "I never in my life seen them so hurt." 

"I know," Ryan said. 

"I have to say Seth, they were actually good," Marissa said as she picked up her plate from the table. She was surprised to learn that Seth had actually learned to cook, but at the same time it made her just a tad bit prouder of the man that he had become. 

"Yeah, well maybe if you�re good I cook you dinner one night," Seth said as he took the plate from her and placed them in the sink to be washed. 

She stood there in amazement as she watched him do the dishes. It was just a simple task, but she knew it was one that the old Seth Cohen hadn�t done before. He either left them, or just placed them in the dishwasher. He had grown up a lot she noticed as she started to walk around the apartment. It was just how she pictured Seth living comic books placed in a huge bookcase in the living room, and a drawing board right next to it. She walked over to look at his newest drawing. She found his sketchbook and began to flip them it. Noticing that Little Miss Vixen and Kid Chino were turning into villains. She let out a small sigh knowing that this was Seth�s way to get his emotions out, but it was when she turned the page that she found a new character one that she didn�t know anything about. 

She placed the book down again and started to slowly walk around the apartment taking everything in around her. It was then that she started to noticed the little touches that only a female would think of placing in the apartment a few flowers placed on the coffee table, along with both a mixture of French magazines, and American ones. She bent over to gentle look though it when she heard the front door open. "I�m home" she head a voice say as she looked up at the front door. 

She heard the water being turned off in to the kitchen as she looked at the women unsure of what to say, "Hey, I�m Marissa an old friend of Cohen," she said as she walked closer to the women. 

"I�m Sam," she said. She had hoped that she would have a French accent, but she was American just like her and Seth. 

She watched as Seth walks over to Sam and gentle gave her a kiss. It was nothing big, but it was at that moment that she realized she had just made thing a bit more complex for everyone. 

"Sam, this is Marissa," she heard Seth say though her thoughts. She noticed that instead of staying closer to Sam though he had moved over to her. 

"Hi, so when are you due?" she asked. 

" December 16," Marissa said as she placed her hand on her stomach. 

"Actually Sam there something I need to tell you I just don�t want to drag this on," Seth said as he stepped closer to Sam. "there no easy way for me to say this so I am just going to come right out with it. Six months ago Marissa was the only one who stood by my side when I get dumped the day of my wedding, and well needless to say we got a little drunk, and six months later," he said as she looked back at Marissa. "I don�t know what�s going to happen, but if it is alright with you I would like for us to work though this." 

She watched as Seth talked to Sam and she knew that he really did have some kind of feeling she just didn�t know what. She knew it was a rebound, but maybe it had the chance of turning into something greater. She stepped away from them to give them some space. 

He wanted nothing more than to talk to Kirsten and Sandy in hopes that they would see how hurt he had been in knowing what he did to Seth, but as he stood in front of the door he wondered if they would even allow him into the house. He rang the doorbell where he would normally just walk into the place he called home for so many years, but as he stood at the door waiting for someone he never felt so out of place before. He felt a bit of relief when Sandy open the front door instead of Kirsten, but instead of letting Ryan into the house he stepped outside and closed to door behind him. "Hey kid I wish I could help you, but Kirsten has her mind set on this," he said as he walked over to Ryan. 

"I know, but I just thought if I could talk with her," Ryan said. 

"I really don�t think you should right now. Maybe give her a few days to calm down," Sandy said. 

"I think she needs to understand where I�m coming from. I never wanted to hurt Seth in any way by doing this. It just kind of happened, and yes, I know I lost the only real brother I could count on. I was just of hoping that maybe we could get pass this one day," Ryan said as he placed his hand on his pocket. "It just that Summer means the world to me right now. I couldn�t picture my life without her in it." 

" I can�t change Kirsten thoughts about this, and I don�t know how Seth is going to react to it. I mean who knows maybe him and Marissa having a baby together maybe he might just grow up. I do know though he is hurt over the fact of Summer leaving him. Did you tell him about you and Summer?" 

"I didn�t get the chance before I had a chance he left for Paris," Ryan said as he looked down at the ground. 

"Well I�m not sure the next time they will be home, but if I were you I would sit down with him," Sandy said, "But I better get in before Kirsten finds out I�m out here with you." 

"Bye," Ryan said as he watched Sandy walked into the house. He walked down to the car as he tired to figure everything out never in all his life did he think being kicked out of a family could hurt as much as it did. The pain that he felt now was nowhere close to the pain that he felt when his real mom had left him just seven years ago. As he sat down in the car, he pulled out the box from his pocket. As he slowly opened it up, he let out a small smile. If he couldn�t have the family, he wanted he could always make it. 

Taking out of cell phone, he hit one as he rang two times he heard on the other end, "Hey sweetie." 

"Hey, I was just wondering are you at work right now." 

"Yeah, why?" 

"I just thought I stop by and take you to lunch," he said as he looked down at the ring. 

"Well how about you stop by in thirty minutes I should be done with my project then." 

"Okay," Ryan said as he hung up the phone and back out of the driveway. 

"Don�t you want to be with the mother of you child?" Sam asked as she looked at Seth. 

"I want to be with her just not in the same way that we are together. Marissa and I have decided that for right now we are better off just being friends though this whole thing. It�s not to say that down the line we don�t fall in love, but we have agreed that we are nothing but friends right now." Seth said as he walked over and gentle placed his hands around his waist. "I�m not sure were this is going between us, but I know I have enjoyed the time spent with you, and not just on a sexual level either. You have really help me grow, and learn how to be a man." 

"I have too. I just don�t want to be the third wheel," Sam said. 

"You won�t," Seth said before he gentle kissed her on her forehead. 

"Okay, I�m just going to take a shower." 

"Okay," Seth said as she turned around to find Marissa gone. At first, he was a bit panic when he didn�t see her, but when he noticed a figure out of the deck he felt better. He gentle walked out to the deck not wanting to disturb her thoughts and gentle stood next to her. When he felt she was ready to speak he said, "Isn�t this city amazing?" 

"Yeah it is," she said as she gentle placed her head on his shoulder. "I kind of always thought I get a few more years here before I had a kid." 

"I know if someone had asked me a week ago if I planned on moving back to the states I would have said no. I just don�t think there any other place to raise a kid. I mean both our parents are still in Newport is just makes sense. Even if we live in New York it�s only what a seven hour flight home." 

"Yeah, well I was actually thinking of maybe moving back to Newport at least for the first two years. I think we are going to need help. After the stories your mom told me about your dad I think I�m going to have my hands full," she said playfully as she gentle nudged him. 

"Oh yeah and when was the last time you changed a diaper?" 

"Actually about a week ago," Marissa said "one of my models just had a little girl and brought her to a shot so I got to practice a bit." 

"Well I guess you be a charge. I get the kid when he is older enough to understand comics." 

Well I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Is Ryan going to ask Summer to marry him? What's going to happen with Sam? Is Kirsten and Sandy going to be able to forgive Summer and Ryan? Please review 


	7. friendship,marriage, growing up, regret

AN: First I would like to thank all of you who reviewed my fanfic so far. I can promise you that things are about to change, and nothing is every what it seems in this fanfic. I'm trying out some different writing styles and plot lines so I'm having fun with this.

First I would like to thank Beast388 and Mr. Destiny for your reviews. Beast388 thank you for being one of the first people to actually say that Seth actually doesn't have it all that bad. That is what I am trying to get across in this story. I guess I wasn't doing a good enough job. Mr. Destiny I hope you enjoy my opening of Sam in this chapter. I plan on keeping her around for a while to help bring some story lines together down the line.

lenewportebeach you might want to give Ryan/Summer a try in this fanfic. I am not a Ryan/Summer fan in the show, but I think I have a pretty easy to enjoy story line going.

LivingintheOCsucks- hey thanks for all your help on this chapter. I'm actually getting a decent amount of reviews this time.

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She walked out onto the deck in hopes of being able to clear her mind of the days events. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy the time she had spent with Seth she just kind of wondered where it would go now that Marissa and a baby were thrown into the picture. As she stepped out onto the deck, she noticed a figure leaning over the railing looking out at the city. "I guess I wasn't the only one needing to do some thinking tonight." She said as she stood at the other end of the railing.

"Seems to be the place to be tonight Seth just went inside to get some sleep," Marissa said as she looked over at Sam.

"Yeah I know," she said as she looked out at the view of the city below them. She was actually kind of glad to have this moment with Marissa she really didn't want any hard feeling between them at this point. "So how did you and Seth meet?"

"We were actually lived next door to each other pretty much our whole life, but never talked until over sophomore year of high school when Ryan came into the picture. Looking back I wish I had gotten to know Seth so much sooner then I did I think life would have been simple with him around."

"I know what you mean with him life is just so simple it's almost like he makes you forget why you were upset in the first place. I know that he has been though a lot in the past six months. I don't know what Seth was like before everything happened, but if he was anything like what he is now I think I would have enjoyed hanging out with him."

"Seth will always be Seth as long as he has comic books, emo music, pancakes, bagels, jokes, and family you have the same old Seth that everyone loved to be around."

"Pancakes?' Sam asked as she looked over at Marissa with a puzzled look. She knew there were things about Seth that she didn't know, but something as simple as one of his favorite breakfast food she should have known.

" Yeah one of Seth's goals in life is to go on a pancake tour of America like in the book 'On the Road' but Jack Kerouac. It is one of Seth's favorite books of all time, and we have always said we would take a road trip one day. We just never got around to it. I left for New York City, and Seth stayed with Summer."

She watched as Marissa talked about the dream that they had of taking a road trip together. She felt a bit hurt over the fact that Seth wouldn't have shared with her a dream like that. They had only been together for five week, but she felt that Seth would tell her something like that. "Well maybe some day you, Seth and your child could take the road trip together," she wanted nothing more than to add herself into the picture, but she really couldn't figure out just yet if she fit into the picture.

"That would be nice. Maybe if things work out with you and Seth you could join us also."

"That would be nice," Sam said as a smile cross her face. Maybe things won't be so bad after all.

"So how did you and Seth meet?"

Sam leaned her back against the railing as she said, "Actually I was working at a little comic shop not far from her trying to make some money so I could take a trip to Italy when Seth walked into the story. I have to admit he looked like a kid in a candy store when he walked into the door. He spent about an hour just browsing though all the comics not really paying attention to anyone, but I just had to get to know him. So, I started to talk to him, and hit we it off. We hung out for a while, but then I was spending two weeks in Italy. When I came back we just picked right up where we left off, and that was five weeks ago." She said as she looked into the apartment. She never allowed herself to move in with someone so fast, but she enjoyed the time spent with him so it wasn't all-bad.

"That sounds like Seth perfect meeting. Did he talk your ear off about comics?"

"OMG yes, it was like all that he knew. He was worst then talking to my ten year old brother," she said as she let out a small laugh. "But Seth did promise next time he is in Newport to look up my little brother and hang out for a few hours. When I told him I was dating Seth Cohen he started asking me all these questions about the comic book."

Marissa let out a small laugh. "Well just be prepared to have them spending hours together then, because Seth will go on for hours if he has someone to list to him," she paused for a moment and said, "He will even go on if he doesn't have anyone to talk to. I made the mistake one day and asked him a simple question that could have taken a small little phase to answer, and he made it into a long drawn out conversation."

"Tell me about it all because I work in a comic shop he thinks I should know everything about it. So I just kind of deal with it, and have set up times that we are aloud to talk about comics."

"That's a good idea," Marissa said as she let out a small yawn. "I think I should be heading to bed, but I have enjoyed this."

"I know me too," Sam said as she watched Marissa walk back inside. When she let out a small sighing knowing now that Marissa wasn't the kind of girl who was going to hang Seth not all to herself, and who knows maybe the three of them will become friends.

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He wanted nothing more then to just ask her to marry him, but as he guided her though the resort he knew that, he had done the right thing. He could tell that she was excited about what was to come, but at the same time, she was scared. He knew that this was a big trust issue being guided though a public place blindfolded, but he was glad that she trust him enough to allow it. "We are almost there," he said as he turns down the hall towards the premium towers penthouse rooms. He had been surprised when he called this morning and actually got one, but he couldn't have been more excited about it.

Things couldn't have gone better for him today he had gotten the most perfect ring this morning, the hotel actually had a room for him, and the girl of his dreams was pressed up against him as he guided her down the hall of the resort. Even though everything else was falling apart around them this was the most important moment in his life. He would give anything to just fast forward though all this and to ask her to marry him. He knew though that she had always wanted this to be special. In addition, deep down he felt as if he had to out do Seth on this.

As they reached the door he stopped, and with his free hand quickly open the door, holding it with his foot he helped guide her into the room. Shutting the door behind him he took one, more look around the room making sure that everything was perfect. Noting that everything was how he wanted it, he gentle guided her towards the balcony. "I hope your hungry," he said as he gentle pull the blind fold off her.

He watched as he face change from wondering to excitement as the blindfold came off her face. "OMG," she said as she wrapped her arms around Ryan.

He hugged her tightly taking in every touch, sight, and smell that come with this moment. He wanted nothing more then to remember how she felt in his arms at this moment or how she let out a gasp as she looked over to her right to find nine roses in a vase. He gentle pulled away from her, but keeping his arms wrapped around her. "Would u like to know what each one means?"

"Yes," she said as she looked up at him.

"The red rose stands for how much I love you, the white for how heavenly you are. The pink one is to thank you for loving me, and the dark pink is my appreciation towards you. The light pink is for your grace when things go wrong, and the orange is for the desire I feel toward you. The yellow rose is a symbol of our friendship, and the lavender stands for love at first sight. It might not have been love at first sight, but every moment I see you I fall in love all over again," he said. He noticed the tears starting to roll down her face as he gentle wiped them away.

"What about the last one?" she asked as she looked up at him.

He let go of her for a moment, and walked over to the vase. "Peach," he said as he picked up the rose. "Peach means lets get together," he said as he walked over towards her.

"And how does that relate to us?" she asked with a small grin.

"Well you see I've been thinking about it. I think it relates to us in the sense that we need to bond together in order to get though everything. I was thinking though that as much as I love having you as my girl friend. I think something is wrong," he said as he pulled back for a moment. He watched as the look in her eyes changed from excitement to worry.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she looked at him.

"Well there one thing really wrong and I don't think I can look past it any longer," he said as he build out the box that he had in his pocket. "You see there is something missing, and I think the only way to fix it is if you put this on your finger," he said as he opens the box.

He watched as he expression changed in just that moment. She reached out and took the ring from the box. She couldn't believe what was going on her. "OMG Ryan is this?" she couldn't even get the words out.

"Yes it is," he said as he got down on one knee. "Summer Roberts will you marry me?"

"Yes," she screamed.

-------

She let out a small sigh as she feel back onto her bed it felt like forever since she been home in her apartment. It felt nice to be home, but it felt even nicer to have Seth here with her. She closed her eyes for a moment as she listen to him walking out the living room talking on the phone to Sam. Marissa wasn't sure how Sam was going to fit into the picture of things, but she wasn't the type of girl to tell Seth who he could be with, and who he couldn't. Plus maybe it might be a good thing having another female around to help keep Seth in order.

A small laugh escape her mouth as she thought about what it is going to be like with Seth being a daddy. Sure, he would be a caring, supportive father who would give anything for his child, but at the same time, she knew he had never changed a diaper, and that he was in for a rude awakening when the baby would cry at two in the morning. She could only image Seth in the kitchen in the morning holding his son or daughter in one hand and a large cup of coffee in the other. She jotted down in her thoughts to make sure they keep a large supply of coffee in the house for a first few months.

"A penny for your thoughts," she heard Seth say as he plopped down on the bed next to her.

"Just thinking about how life is going to change," she said as she tossed him on of her pillows.

He lie down on the bed next to her and said, "I've learn something in the past six months. Life is full of changes, and sometimes the ones that we least expect are the ones that are truly wonderful."

She turned to face Seth a bit. "When did you become so wise?"

"I don't know," he said before he paused for a while. "When I first went to Paris I was so lost as a person everything that I had known was changed. Did you know that Ryan was the guy?"

"Yes," she said as she looked at him.

"I found out that morning after we hang out, and just hours later I was on a plane to Paris. I had to admit I thought being in a new place would cure me right away, but it didn't. At first I was so depressed that I sat in my hotel room drinking, drawing, and listening to music just to forget about everything that had happen. After a week, though I couldn't stand the sight of my hotel room anymore it was a mess, and I felt a mess. So, I decided to go out for a walk. So I did, and it was that moment walking though the street of Paris that yes I might have been alone, and without anything I knew, but I knew I could change my life. So I did I started working on my comic book, and just got out there and met some new people. I used the time to grow as a person." He paused for a moment before saying, "I guess I never really got that chance to be on my own. Unlike you, I didn't go off to college I stayed in Newport with Summer and Ryan, and stayed the same Seth. I guess deep down I always envied you for that."

She listen to his speak about his life, and once again he amazed her with just how much he had really changed over the past six months. He had turned into this most amazing man that she would be glad to call her best friend, and father of her child. "You amaze me," she said as she reached out and placed her hand on top of his. "I never thought that I would be laying here like this with you and be so amazed at the man you had become. You are the same Seth in that you are still funny, and just totally a geek," she said with a small little laugh. "But you have also become this man who any girl would be lucky to have as a husband, and I am glad that out of all the one night stands that I had over the years that you where the guy who has given me this life inside of me." She said as she felt the baby start to kick inside of her. She placed Seth's hand on the spot before saying, "Do you feel that?"

She watched as his eyes grew with amazement as he felt the baby kicking for the first time. "Wow," he said as he lay there with his hand on her belly. "It's amazing."

"I know," she said.

"Does it hurt?"

"No, the first few times it just felt funny."

He lowed his head down to her belly. "Hey little one, I'm sure that your mommy here has told you all about me, but I thought I would tell you that I'm sorry for not being here sooner for you and your mom. I promise though to never leave you, and to be here as you grow up."

Marissa let out a small smile as she lies there listening to Seth talk to the baby. She had to admit it was cute watching him lay there with the look of amazement in his eyes. "So I was thinking how do you feel about going back to Newport?"

"Why?"

"I was just thinking we could really use some help with taking care of the baby, and I'm sure both your parents and mine would want to get to know their first grand child."

"I guess that makes sense," he said as he lies there looking up at here. "Plus Sam said she going to move back home to corona del mar so we will be closer."

"Well see then Newport won't be so bad."

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This was suppose to be the most perfect morning in her life, but instead she sat her in this over sized chair trying to figure out just what was wrong with this picture. She loved Ryan, but she also knows that this wasn't the type of thing Ryan would be at a spur of the moment. Ryan would sit down and talk with her to make sure that marriage was something she was ready for with him. They had never talked about marriage until last night, and even the thought of actually moving in together hadn't been crossed yet. She wouldn't tell anyone this but she was still a little uncertain if she had done the right thing leaving Seth the way that she did.

A day didn't go by when she didn't think about what he was doing, or if he was happy with his life. She knew that she had hurt him more then she had every expected to, and maybe because Seth was her first and only love before Ryan she was kind of scared about making the wrong mistake. She loved Ryan, but deep down she would always love Seth.

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Please review. So what was the reason for Ryan to propose to Summer? How will Sam play a part? What will Seth be like as a dad? All to come in the next chapter. Also little baby Cooper-Cohen will show up in the next chapter.


	8. Baby and doubts

An: thank you guys for your reviews. I hope you enjoy this next chapter. Little baby Cohen comes into the picture, and an old friend come back to Newport.

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This life was something new to her and every moment she was just in awe with how great it had turned out. She placed her hand on her back she had to admit the first six months had come easier to her then the past three months. She was just thankful that she had Seth here to help her though it. She leaned against the wall of the kitchen as she watched him do the morning dishes. She had offered to do them, but every since her first false alarm he had given her strict order to just relax. She had to admit she liked the thought of having someone take care of her every need, and if it couldn't be someone she loved then she was grateful that she had someone like Seth Cohen. All the years that she had known him she had never thought that this would happen, but she had to admit she kind of like the idea a lot.

The family might be a little screwed up, but then again her family life had always been screwed up. So what else would be new? At least she knew that Seth would be a great father, her child would have two grandparents that cared a lot, and who either Seth or herself ended up marriage down the line would just add love to the family they had already started to build. Plus the one thing she would give this child was a strong last name something that actually stood for a family. She had decided from day one that she wanted the baby to be a Cohen.

She let out a small gasp as she felt another contraction she looked up at the clock they were indeed getting closer this time around. Since she already had two false alarms she had decided not to open her mouth right away, but now they were six minutes apart and getting stronger. She closed her eyes for a moment trying to get though the pain. She tried to think about how wonderful it would be to go back to Newport and be with the Cohen's, but the thought didn't help her. As the pain started to slip away from her she opened her eyes to find that Seth had moved from the sink to right in front of her. "It's time," she said trying to remain nice and claim. She was hoping that Seth wouldn't freak out about this like he did the first false alarm.

But instead Seth surprised her by putting his arm around her waist and helping to guide her to the front door. He didn't say much even though she knew that his mind was going a mile a minute with thoughts about becoming a father. As they reached the front door he said, "Are we putting bets on if it's a false alarm?" he asked with a small playful tone.

She was grateful that he had decided to take this so light at this time because for as strong as he was acting at this moment she felt like she was going to fall apart at any moment. "No this is the real thing," she said as Seth helped her slip on her jacket.

He stood in front of her helping her to button it up as he said, "Yeah that's what you said when you woke me up at three in the morning last week."

She loved that he could take away all her fears with just being here for her. The way that he took the time to help her put on her jacket just meant the world to her at this moment. She watched as he picked up the bag that they had packed a week ago knowing that he due date was getting closer. He placed the bag on his right shoulder, before looking around the apartment to make sure that there was nothing else that he had forgotten.

"You ready?"

All she wanted was for the word yes to escape her mouth so that she could act strong and just get to the hospital, but instead tears just start to flow from her eyes and she was unable to control them any longer. She just stood there letting them escape until she felt the familiar arms of Seth wrapped around her. "What's wrong?" he asked.

'What's wrong?' She wished that she knew the answer to that all the months of being strong though this never allowing anyone to see how scared she was of being a mother just come pouring out of her. "I'm scared Seth. What if I'm not a good mom? What if I don't love this child like I'm supposed to? What if I can't do this?" She let it all out for the first time, and it felt great to know that Seth was there for her.

"I don't know what the future is going to bring, but I do know that if you and me work at it we are both going to be great parents. You have the gift in you to be a great mom, and I know once you hold this baby in the hospital you are going to feel what I have felt for the past three months," he said as he took his thumb and gentle wiped the tears from her face.

Every world that Seth said to her just made all her fears fall from her shoulder. It was almost like when he was around he took all her worries away from her and placed them on his shoulder. "Well how about we go."

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Shopping was the one thing that she felt could help ease the pain that she was going though, but three hours later, and $1500 spent she felt no more better then when she walked into Fashion Island this morning. Shopping was always her release, but for the past three months she couldn't seem to get out of this funk that she was in. She loved Ryan there was no hiding the fact that she was happy to be with him, but the thought of marriage just scared the crap out of her. It wasn't like she wasn't ready for the step her in life because it wasn't true nine months ago she had almost gotten marriage to Seth. Now though everything was different.

She was in love with two people in two totally different ways. The love that she felt towards Seth was something that every girl dreamt of feeling. With Seth she knew that life would be great between them. They would fight, and make up. He would always be there for her in the quirky ways that he had always been there, and just when she would doubt his love he would go, and do something that would totally make her forget why she was doubting him. Ryan on the other hand was something different. It was new and exciting, and every moment that they spent together made her crave yet another one. They were sexual, but yet best friends.

If she was a real best friend too him then why couldn't she tell him the truth about what she was feeling. About how scared she was, and how uncertain she was that this was the next logical step. Instead she was here at Fashion Island all alone. Sure she had friends, but no one that she could really count on. Not like it used to be years ago her, Marissa, Seth and Ryan. She could remember the last time she really sat down and talk to Marissa. She had found out that Seth and her were moving back to Newport to raise the their child, and that Seth had been dating this girl name Sam who would also be moving close by. She admitted when she heard that Seth had moved on she felt like everything she knew was falling apart. Seth was happy, or at least that was what she assumed. From the sounds of things he was looking forward to being a father, he was being a great friend to Marissa, and he was falling in love with some girl that he had met in Paris.

Seth was living the life that she wanted more than anything right now. She wanted to be the one carrying his baby, having him fall madly in love with her, and being her best friend though it all. She knew she could have had it if she hadn't left him, but she did, and she wasn't sure what to do anymore. These past three months had been nothing, but wondering just what she was supposed to be doing. Was she supposed to be with Ryan? Try and fight for Seth love? Or just leave the both of them and start a new life? She had thought about the last one a few times, but every time it crossed her mind she would just look at Ryan and remember the man that she had fallen in love with.

The one who whisked her off on a romantic night o ask for her hand in marriage. The man who would give her anything that she wanted. She knew that he would give her the world if she asked, and she would be dumb to leave a guy like that. All of her so called friends would jump at the chance to be with him if given the chance. She acted like she didn't know that they would two time her given the chance if she had learned anything from high school was how to work a crowd, and that was what she did with life.

------

He cradled his new born son in his arms not wanting to let go of the most important person in his life at this moment. From the moment that he held little Jack Stanford Cooper Cohen in his arms three hours early he had known that his life had just changed in the most amazing way. Not only did he have to worry about his own actions, but he had to make sure that they wouldn't harm little Jack. He gentle sat down in the chair next to Marissa bed trying not to wake Jack or Marissa. It had been a tough morning for the both of them.

Looking down at his son he realized just how much Cohen traits he had the hair of the top of his head with a dead give away that he was a Cohen. Letting out a small laugh he thought about the Cohen eye brows he hoped to Jack had gotten Marissa genes on that one. He had noticed early this morning that his son's eyes had taken after Marissa there was just this sparkle to it that he noticed every time he looked at Marissa. Looking up from his son he noticed Marissa starting to wake up from her sleep. "Good afternoon," Seth said.

"Hey," she said as she turned her head towards Seth. "how long have I've been asleep?"

"Just a few hours," Seth said as he moved in the seat a bit so that Marissa could look at Jack. "This little guy just decided to get some sleep."

"Well then I guess you had some bonding time," Marissa said as she moved so that her feet with hanging from the bed.

"Yeah, what little time I had with him. Our little son had all the nurses paying attention to him." Seth said as he got up from the chair.

"I bet it had more to do with you eating up all the attention so that you didn't have to changed a dirty diaper," she said with a small laugh as she moved over a bit so that Seth could sit next to her.

"Actually you would be proud of me," he said as he sat down on the bed next to her. "I changed my first diaper about two hours ago."

"And I missed it," she said as she playfully punched him in the arm.

"Hey watch out you wouldn't want to wake our son up now," he said as he leaned in closer to Marissa. "You want to hold him?"

"Sure," Marissa said as she reached out to take her son in her arms.

He gentle placed Jack in her arms. He placed an arm around his shoulder as he looked down at his son. "How do you feel about being a mom now?"

"Great," she said as she looked up at Seth. "This little guy is so amazing. It's like for everything bad that has happen in our life we were given this one great amazing moment to make up for everything that has sucked in our life."

"I never thought of it like that," Seth said. "All I know is that nine months ago my life had fallen apart, and now sitting here I'm not sure what tomorrow is going to bring, but I know that everything I will do in the future will be to make sure that Jack has the most perfect life."

"When did you become so sweet?" Marissa asked.

"Not sweet, I just want to make sure that my son grows with the most perfect life. When he has his first born I want him to be able to think back on all the times that I was there for him, and know just how much I loved him."

He watched Marissa for a moment as she sat there in amazement with what he had just said. He knew that something had changed inside of him since he found out about Jack. From the moment in Paris he made all his choices based on what would be best for Marissa and Jack. "Talking about fathers have you called your parents yet?"

"Not yet it was to early," Seth said. "But if you think you can handle your son for a little while I would like to go call them."

"Yeah, I think I can handle it," she said as she looked down at Jack.

"Okay, I be back in a little while," Seth said as he leaned down and gentle kissed Jack on the forehead. "Be good for your mommy." He looked up at Marissa as he stepped back for a moment. He leaned down and gentle kissed her on the forehead before walking out of the room.

As he walked out of the hospital he turned on his cell phone double checking the time to make sure it wasn't to early he dialed home. "Hello," he heard his mom on the phone after the third ring.

"Hey mom," Seth said as he sat down on the bench outside the entrance.

"Hey Seth, how are you and Marissa?"

"Will I'm doing great. Marissa a little tired, but I guess that is expected after a four hour labor."

"Labor?" Kirsten said.

"Yes it seems that you are a grandma now."

"Really?"

"Yes as of 11:15 this morning you have a 8 pounds little baby boy grandson, and dad will be glad to know that his name is Jack Stanford Cooper Cohen," he said as he leaned against the wall.

"I can't wait to see him."

"We will be home for the holiday. I was thinking we might stay here for a few days. We have everything packed, but I'm thinking Marissa might want to spend some time alone with Jack without everyone around."

"Yeah that's fine," Kirsten said. "Just let me know when to pick you up at the airport. The pool house is all set up for you, Marissa and Jack."

"Thanks mom," Seth said. "I'm going to get back upstairs to Marissa."

"Tell her I call later."

"Okay," he said before hang up the phone.

"Hey you ready to go out tonight?" Anna asked as she walked into Summer's place. Finding her laying on the couch with picture surrounding her on the floor, table, and the couch itself. Just briefly looking at them you could see times spent with both Seth and Ryan. "Or how about we just have a girl night in. We haven't had one of those in a while."

"That sounds good," Summer said as she looked up at Anna. The only real friend she had in Newport now. She moved over on the couch a bit so that Anna could sit next to her. "Actually I was wondering could we just have so much needed girl talk."

"Sure," Anna said. "What do you need?"

She wasn't sure on how to answer that. She knew what she needed, but she was afraid that if she said it out loud it would come out sound stupid. "I don't know where to start."

"How about you start with theses pictures, and we work are way from there," Anna said as she picked up a picture in her hand that Summer hand been holding just moments ago of Seth, Ryan, Marissa and herself.

"I'm not sure if I am suppose to marry Ryan," she said surprised by how good it felt to get it off her chest. She hadn't said those words to anyone in three months.

"I can't tell you if you are supposed to be with Ryan or not. I'm not sure what happen between the two of you before I got here, but all I know is that when I watch the two of you Ryan is so in love with you. Does this have to do with Seth moving back to Newport?"

"How did you hear about that?"

"I was out shopping for a friend of mine little girl, and ran into Kirsten baby shopping for Seth and Marissa little one. We got to talking and found out that Seth, Marissa and the little baby is going to move into the pool house for a while," Anna said.

"Maybe it does," she said.

"Summer you have to remember you are the one who left him. He moved on with his life. From what Kirsten told me he was really depressed the first few months, but then he met this girl name Sam, and he found out he's going to be a daddy. It has to be the best moment in Seth life to become a daddy."

"I know, I just always thought that Seth and I was going to start the family together. I always pictured what our family would look like. It would be the best of the Cohen and Robert worlds. Now though he's happy, and I don't know if I can face him."

"Do you love Ryan?"

"Yes," Summer said without even thinking. "It's not that I don't love Ryan because I do, but has to do more with the fact that I know I screwed up the most perfect life. Sandy and Kirsten won't say a word to me or Ryan, and I know that it tears Ryan apart. I guess part of me thinks that if I end it with Ryan then he could go back to his life with the Cohen's. I know it's a dream world, but it's one I would love to see happen. I just want Ryan to be happy."

"I know you do. Have you tried to talk to Ryan about this?"

"No," Summer said as she looked down. "I've been trying to think of away to make him happy."

"Well I think he will be happy if you just talk to him,"

"Do you think that will work?"

"Yes," Anna said.

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AN: Well I hope you guys have enjoyed this chapther. Next chapter bring the holidays, newport, and the gang all in the same city.


	9. Back to Newport

AN; for I would like to wish you all a happy holiday. Sorry this is a bit late, but figure better late then never. This cover a bit of everything and I hope that you enjoy it.

The Cohen household was more in the spirit of Chrismakkah then it had every been before maybe it was the fact that Kirsten just love the idea of having her son home with her, or the fact that it would be the first Chrismakkah for Jack, and Seth was going all out this year for him. "Seth you do understand when Jack is older he won't remember his first Chrismakkah," Sam said as she walked into the Cohen's kitchen as she held Jack in her arms.

"I have that covered," Seth said as he turned around holding a bag of film, the video camera with a few extra tapes on the side, and all the batteries that they would need in order to makes sure every single moment was count on film or by photo.

"Don't you think you are over doing it?" Sam asked as she walked closer to Seth.

"Nope not for his first Chrismakkah," he said as he reached out for his son. As he took his from Sam he said, "Plus he isn't for the only person experiencing Chrismakkah for the first time."

"I have to admit I am getting into the spirit of things," she said as she leaned against the count next to her.

"I'm glad," Seth said as he leaned over and gentle placed a kiss on her lips. "It's so nice being in the same town as you again."

"I know," she said.

"Hey," Marissa said as she walked into the kitchen along with Kirsten with packages in both their arms from shopping all day.

"You should have told me you were home," Seth said as she walked over towards Marissa. "I would have gotten dad to help." He said with a small laugh as he handed his son to Marissa.

"I think you can learn something from me," Sandy said as he walked into the kitchen with the rest of the bags in his arms.

"Come on dad you showing me up," he said with a small laugh as he looked over to his son. "Jack it's moment like this that makes me regret bring you home. You going to pick up on bad habits." He said as the words come out of his mouth he felt two slaps on the back of his head. "Hey," he said as he looked from Sam to Marissa. "What did I do?"

"It's what you didn't do," Marissa said

"Okay I'm sorry," he said as he back away from the two of them. He had plans to finish for this Chrismakkah and work wasn't being done with everyone in the kitchen. "I think we need to get back to work. I was thinking maybe Marissa, Jack and I could go get a tree, and Sam you could stay with my parents to help out."

"Don't you think Marissa needs to rest?" Kirsten said as she looked from her son to Marissa.

"I promise we won't be long. I'm sure there not many trees to pick from," he said as he looked at Marissa. "Plus I want Jack to have the whole Chrismakkah experience."

"It's fine," Marissa said. "But Seth you have to help me get him ready."

"Okay," he said. As everyone started to go their own way, he gentle grabbed Sam by the arm to hold her in the kitchen a bit longer. "Hey are you okay staying with my parents?"

"Yeah, your parents seem pretty cool. Plus since I be around here a lot I think I have to get to know them," Sam said.

"So you aren't mad that I didn't ask you to help with the tree."

"Why would I be? I understand that this is Jack's first Chrismakkah, and yeah it would have been nice to join you, but I understand that you and Marissa need some time to bond with your son," Sam said took his hand. "Plus I already cleared it with Marissa. We are having a date tonight."

"We are?"

"Yeah, I have everything planned so just be ready by 9 o'clock tonight," she said as she pushed him towards the living room.

As he walked into the living room, his mind was in gear as he tried to figure out just what she had planned from him tonight. He was broken out of his daze though as he noticed Marissa and Jack on the floor. Every time he saw the two of them together, he was taken back on just how perfect they were together, and how lucky he was to have both of them in his life. He noticed Marissa looking up at him for a moment, and as their eyes met, he felt as if this was the perfect moment. His son and his best friend that was all that mattered at this moment.

He walked over to them and kneeled down next to Marissa. "How about we get this little guy ready for his first tree shopping Chrismakkah moment."

"Okay," Marissa said as she reached behind her to grab the diaper bag that had seem to become attached to either Seth or Marissa. "So I was thinking we should go to the usual place. If I remember right they had some pretty nice trees last time I was home."

"Actually last night while I was taking Jack for a ride around Newport I noticed a new one. There was this tree I saw from the road, and thought it was perfect."

"And you didn't stop?" Marissa said as she started to put Jack's jacket on.

"What did you really expect me to take care of Jack all by myself. I would have had to take him out of the car seat, put his jacket on, taken the diaper bag, brought the tree, but him back in the car. No thank you to much work," he said with a small laugh.

"Just wait till he's get bigger," Marissa said as she picked up her son in her arms.

"Nah, plus I think the two of you look so cute when you hold him," he said as he leaned over and place a kiss on Jack's forehead as he lifted his head his eyes met with Marissa's for a second time that afternoon. There was something about her eyes that just pulled him into her. She had his full attention with those eyes, but also there was something more that he didn't understand.

"We should get going before it gets to be to late," Marissa said as she stood up as she broke the bond between the two of them.

"Yeah," he said as she stood up and grabbed the diaper bag.

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"I can't believe we didn't think of getting a tree before tonight," Summer as her and Ryan drove town to this new place he had noticed on her way home from work the other night.

"I know, I guess with everything going on we just kind of forgot," he said.

She looked over at him and could tell that something was wrong. "I'm sorry you can't spend time with your family."

" I am spending time with my family. You are all that I have known, and couldn't be happier to spend Christmas with you," he said.

She felt hurt a bit when he didn't say Chrismakkah. She was kind of hoping for one of the famous Cohen's Chrismakkah, but she knew this year would be different. "I know, but I still wish you could have spent it with the Cohen's."

"That the last place I want to be," he said as he pulled into the parking lot. "Plus with how the treated us I don't see them being my family. Family doesn't disown each other."

"I know," she said as she opens the door. All she wanted was to make him forget about everything and to have a wonderful Christmas with just the two of them. As she walked around the car, she reached out for Ryan's hand. After some much thinking last night she realized she had been distant to Ryan when he needed her the most, and made it her goal to be more then for him then she had been. "So who's place are we keeping it at?"

"I was thinking how about your place," Ryan said as they walked onto the lot. "I just think you have bigger space for it."

"That's fine," she said as she walked around the place. There wasn't all that many left, but she was determined to find the perfect one on the lot.

"So, I was thinking how about we go to you dad's for an early diner that way we could have the morning, and afternoon to ourselves."

"That sounds like a nice idea," she said as she stopped in front of a tree. That looked like it could be the perfect one.

"What do you think about this one Marissa?' she heard a familiar voice on the other side of the tree. He first thought was to run away far from the two of them, but when she looked up at Ryan she knew that he had heard it also. They hadn't seen or spoken to Seth since the wedding, and she didn't even know if she knew about her and Ryan.

"What should we do?" Summer whispered so that just Ryan could hear her.

"I think we should wish them a Merry Christmas," he said as he stepped around the tree to the other side. He didn't say anything at first, but when he caught Marissa eyes he said, "Hey."

Summer moved so that she was standing next to Ryan. As she looked over at Cohen she felt as if she should have ran he looked so happy holding his son in his arms. "Hey," she said as she looked at them.

"Hey guys," Marissa said. "How are you guys doing?"

"Pretty good," Ryan said his eyes moved right to the little baby. "Who is this?" He asked as he moved closer to Seth.

She noticed that Seth held on tighter to his son as Ryan moved closer to him. "This is Jack Stanford Cooper Cohen," Marissa said.

"Coop you look great for just having a baby," Summer said for the first time moving closer to the two of them.

"Well Cohen here makes me do all the errands," she said with a small laugh.

Summer couldn't help, but notice a smile across Seth face. The first one she had seen on him in a long time. She used to be able to make him smile like that, but now someone else did the job.

"Hey, not true, I ran out the other night for bagels," Seth said. "Plus I watch this little guy when Marissa goes out."

"I'm glad you guys are happy. How long are you going to be in Newport?"

"Actually we are moving back," Marissa said as she placed her arm around Seth back.

"We have to get together some time," Summer said. She knew that it was a false promise. The thought of the four of them being able to hang out just didn't happen. "But since this is Jack's first tree I let you guys have this one."

"Thanks," Seth said.

She grabbed hold of Ryan hands as she started to walk away from Seth and Marissa. She was so proud for how Ryan had acted towards Seth, but she was also surprised with how Seth acted towards them. She had expected Seth to still be upset with them, but somehow over the past nine months he had really grown up. "Are you okay?" Summer asked as they were far enough from Seth and Marissa.

He didn't say anything at first and she knew that it had effect him more then he would like to admit to anyone right now. "I'm just surprised with how happy he is. I somewhat always thought he was depressed, and still upset with us. For nine months, I've felt so bad that I had really hurt him, but seeing him makes me feel like I've wasted the time I could have been happy. It's like I wasted nine months because of him."

She noticed the anger in his voice, and wanted nothing more then to make him happy. "You didn't waste these nine months you have been wonderful to me."

"I don't know any more. I can't seem to make you happy. Maybe I just need some time alone," he said as he started to walk to the car. "I give you a ride home if you want."

"No thanks I call someone else," she said as she walked away from him. She couldn't believe that he would just leave her like this. She knew that with Seth back in town, things would be harder on them, but she also wished that would bring him closer then tear them apart like they had.

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"So is that all you are going to tell me about running into Ryan and Summer today," Sam said as they sat down on the beach.

"What else is there to tell you? We ran into this looking for a tree, and well nothing really happen. They looked like there were in love, and well I'm happy with my life. For the past nine months I have dreaded the thought of seeing them, but maybe it was because I had Marissa and Jack by my side, but it just made it so much easier." Seth said as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "Plus why would I care about them I have the perfect life now. A great girl friend, a best friends, and a son who I couldn't love anymore."

" I might not know you as well as Marissa does, but I think you are hiding something," she said.

"Nope, believe me you know when I'm upset about something. I mope around and it's all that I can talk about. If Summer and Ryan were on my mind, believe me you know. So how was today with my mom?"

"It went great," Sam said. "We had a nice long talk about everything. She told me stories about you that you most likely didn't want me to know. She made me see this new side about you, but she also told me about you and Marissa. How you guys lived next to each other, but never said a word. Well expect for when you guys were like two and three. She showed me some cute pictures of the two of you as little kids. It was just a nice afternoon learning about your family."

"I hope to god she show you the naked pictures of me in the tub," Seth said as he hung he head down in shame.

"Nope," Sam said, "but she did show me that time your dad took you to the beach, and within ten minutes you were naked running around," she said.

"Hey how was I supposed to know? I was only two I thought it was a huge bathtub," he said as he let out a small laugh. "Like your mom won't tell me those stories when I met them next week."

"Nope, I made my dad promise to hide all the pictures so my mom can't show them."

"Well then I guess I just have to get to know your dad."

"He still won't give in. I'm a daddy girl. He will do anything I ask."

"I come up with some way," he said.

"I like to see that," Sam said as she leaned in closer to Seth.

"So how was Jake tonight?"

"Much better, I just hope he starts to sleep though the night. I'm not sure how many more nights we can go on four hours a night."

"Well I told Marissa this afternoon if you every need someone to watch him in the afternoon so you guys can get some sleep I don't mind watching him."

"I know," Seth said.

-----

After leaving Summer at the tree lot he didn't really know where to go so he just drove all around trying to find someplace to clear his mind, but everywhere that he went it just made him miss his life even more. He hated the fact of not being with the Cohen's for the holidays. All night everywhere that he went is saw families together enjoying this time together. He wanted nothing more to be one of those families, but he knew the likely hood of that happening would be pretty slim.

Now he sat alone in front of the Cohen's household thinking about everyone that he had hurt, and how much it had really hurt him to see how happy Seth and Marissa we together. He had also seen Seth tonight with some girl down at the beach; they looked as though they couldn't be any happier together at this moment. He found himself envy of the person that Seth had become. He didn't seem to be the tiniest bit upset about seeing Summer and him today. It was almost as if he didn't even care.

He pulled the car down the road a bit, and got out walking up to the Cohen's house. He walked up the driveway to the Cohen's house and slipped into the back yard unnoticed. He walked around slowly to the windows were he looked in, and noticed just how everything was done up. He noticed a stack of present on the floor under the tree most of them for the baby he thought. He could have image Kirsten going into shopping over load for her first grandson.

As he walked down a bit more as he noticed someone sleeping on the couch he couldn't make out just whom it was, but then he heard someone opening the door to the pool house. He turned around in hopes that who every happen to be there was in a good mood tonight. He had a feeling though who ever was up at three in the morning wasn't in the best of moods. He slide down along a pole into hopes that they hadn't seen him.

He stayed low and out of sight, but he couldn't help but watch as Seth walked around the backyard holding his little son in his arms. As he looked up, he noticed Marissa standing in the doorway watching Seth and Jack walk around the backyard. "I'm glad we moved back here couldn't do this in New York this time of year."

"I know," he heard Seth say back.

As he sat there watching the two of them in the backyard he was taken back on just how much they seem to be like a couple to him. They just seem to fit so well together.

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please review. Won't up date without a few.


	10. growing together

AN thank you guys for the feed back. As for where I am going with the Ryan/Summer just stay along for the ride. I think you guys will enjoy what I have in the works for them. As for Seth/Marissa well I can't promise what is going to happen. I have two ideas one that leads them into being a couple, and one that doesn't. I see where it goes.

The day's event kept her mind in full motion as she thought about how perfect the day had been for everyone. She had to admit it was the first holiday in a long time with no drama, and she really enjoyed it. Instead of something going wrong they enjoyed a nice peacefully holiday at home. Sam had been here this morning for a few hours, but mainly it had just been Seth, Kirsten, Sandy, and Jack. The only people she really wanted to spend her days with. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy the time she spent with Sam, but at some points she just needed to spend time with Seth and Jack. Even Kirsten and Sandy understood that today and after they ate dinner as a family Kirsten and Sandy watched a movie while she spent the night down at the beach with Seth and Jack.

Kirsten had told her that if they took Jack outside for a few hours before bedtime he might get to sleep easier for them. It wasn't that she complained about the amount of time it took to get him to sleep it was the fact that either her or Seth had slept a straight night since Jack was born. She felt more sorry for Seth then herself she was able to take some time of work, and still have a pay check coming in, Seth on the other hand needed to finishes his latest comic book. When he wasn't with his son, or his parents he was drawing in that little sketchbook of his.

"What you thinking about?" she heard his voice as she looked up at him.

"Nothing really," she said as she moved over on the lounge chair so that he could lie down next to her. "How was Jack tonight?"

"After I gave him a bath, and rocked him for a bit he went to sleep pretty easy for me tonight. I just hope that he sleeps the whole night," he said as he placed his arms under his head.

"I know, if there is one thing I miss about not having a kid is being able to actually get a full night of sleep," Marissa said as she rolled over, and gentle placed her head on his shoulder. "But I know you have a busy day tomorrow with the comic book so I won't be mad at you if you slept in your old room."

"I'll be fine, mom's making the coffee extra strong for me in this morning," he said as she shift his body weight a bit to be closer to her.

She loved how this felt when they laid together like this. She felt so safe next to him, and like no matter what happen in their lives that Seth would be here for her and Jack. She had been surprised with how he acted since he had become a father. He was scared at first there was no way to hide that, but over the week he had really opened up to the idea of being a daddy. He allowed her to sleep in while he took Jack into the kitchen to have breakfast, and put him in the crib as he did work, or even just the simple fact that he wanted to give him a bath at night. She has even found him with a book or two in front of him about being a good parent.

It was more though moments like this that she was surprised with how well he had turned out. She knew that the feeling they had towards each other was complex. She loved him there was no doubt about that, but it was more of a love towards a man that had help her to bring this wonderful bundle of joy into this world. Sometime though as she laid here at night with him as they looked up at the stars she found herself wondering what it would be like to have him not only as the father of her child, but the man that she loved with all her heart. She never told anyone this, but all though out high school when he was with Summer she always wondered what that kind of love would feel like. Here she was though with the life that she had always wondered about, but yet something was missing from it all.

She felt him shift under her body a bit, and felt one of his arms drape down along side of her. "All the years of growing up here I never used to lay out like this and watch the stars. I feel like for 21 years I've been missing something. It's almost like my life has changed so much over the past year that it just fits to be doing something I've never done before."

"When I first moved to New York City I felt like I had left everything that I knew and loved. Sure I was in a huge city, and made friends pretty easy, but it wasn't the same as you, Summer, and Ryan. In the late hours of the night when I was all-alone I used to go up to the rooftop and just look up at the sky. I always kind of hoped that someone from home was looking up also," Marissa said in a soft tone voice. She had never told anyone about those nights before. She had always seen it as a weakness until now. Now in Seth arms she felted like her past was just events to get her to this point.

"If you had told me I would have joined you a few nights," Seth said in a soft tone like she had spoken to him. "But there's a lot of things that had I known about in the past my life would have been so different right now. Nine months ago I would have given anything for a different life. I wanted nothing more then to just crawl up in ball and die Now though," he paused for a moment and looked down at Marissa, " I wouldn't change a moment in my life for what I have at this very moment. I know that we are on this intense ride together, but I really don't know anyone that I would want to take this ride with."

"Not even Sam?" she asked as much as she sometime wished she didn't have to share some of these moments with Sam she wasn't a bad person to have around. Plus if Seth loved Sam she wasn't about to get in the way.

"To be honest," he said as he shifted his body so that he was on his side with his arm under her head, and one of her waist. "I'm not really sure if what I feel towards Sam is love. I always kind of saw her as this rebound from Summer, but as the months went on I kind of started to have feeling for her, and although I don't think it is love I think if given time it could become it. Right now though at this very moment I couldn't image my life being with anyone but you. You are my best friends, and I'm so grateful to have a son with you. It might have been a one-night stand with us, but over the past three months I couldn't have image my life doing anything else. Last night when we ran into Summer and Ryan proved to me that all that I need I have right here with me. I have you and Jack and that is all that I care about. For once in my life I'm actually happy with how everything has turned out I have this amazing son who has taught me so much in seven days, this best friend who has really helped me to grow up, and yeah a girlfriend who I enjoy being around."

As the words started to pour of his mouth she couldn't help but be in awe with everything that he said. She knew that he had changed a lot over the past three months, but she had never expected for it to go this far. As she lay there with his arms wrapped around her, she could feel his every move, and she was totally taken back with what he said to her. She wasn't sure how to respond back to him with a fear that this might ruin this perfect moment between two people. She moved so that her forehead was against his as she said. "I couldn't image being with anyone but you." As the words came out of her mouth it had been the first time she had every spoken those words to anyone before, and she actually meant to. In this very moment she knew that her feeling for him was changing, and she hoped to god it was just because of the night.

--------

Never in all his life had he searched this hard for something before, but he knew that he had made a mistake. He would give anything to take it all back, but he knew he couldn't. He had made a mistake in the whole way of dealing with everything not just seeing Seth and Marissa yesterday when they were at the tree lot, but the whole fact of lying to people he loved, and keeping the most important moments in his life a secret. He knew he had to change it, but he didn't know how he was going to do so. He had spent most of the morning doing some errands that he hoped would be enough to make up for how he behaved, and now here it was almost nine o'clock at night. He still hadn't given his Christmas gift to the one person who deserved it the most.

At first he had spent a few hours at her place in the hopes that he would be there, but when she didn't show up he went to Mr. Roberts house. That hadn't gone well at all. Mr. Roberts had told him that she had called to say that she couldn't stop by today, and would call when she got where she was going. Next he had gone to Anna place, but she hadn't been home. So now here he was driving around Newport as he thought about where on earth she could be. He picked up his cell phone, and dialed her number for what seemed like the 100th time today. It went to the voice mail, and he left yet another message. "I know that I screwed up big time with you yesterday I just didn't think that seeing Seth and Marissa would hurt that much. I know it no excuse, and I should have stayed with you. Isn't that what being a couple is all about helping each other? I know I haven't done that, and if you allow me to I would love to make it up to you. Please call me back, and tell me where you are." He said into the phone As he placed the phone on the seat he felt as though he had lost everything.

He realized that last night when he stopped by the Cohen's house. He knew that he shouldn't have been there, but he just missed the feel of being home. Never in his life had he enjoyed it as much as when he was with the Cohen. What had hurt him the most though was when he saw Seth and Marissa together in the backyard with their son. Unlike at the tree lot it had taken his breath away when he saw them together, and it made him wish that he had a life like they had together. He wanted to have that family, and he knew the only person he wanted that life with was Summer. She was his everything, and as much as it hurt him over the past year to be lying to everyone the only thing that made it better was when he saw or talked to Summer. He loved her more than anything in the world, and would give anything to have it back.

--------

As she rolled over in an unfamiliar bed she looked over to the other side of the hotel room to find her blonde friend still asleep in the bed next to her. As she looked at the clock she noticed that it was still early, but as much as she would have enjoyed some more sleep she knew that her mind wouldn't allow her to. She was surprised with just how easy she had fallen asleep, and was thankful to at least a few hours of sleep. As she placed her feet on the floor she looked over at her phone. She picked it up as she did so she noticed that she had 40 missed calls, and 15 new messages. She placed the phone back on the table. She knew that they were all from Ryan. She had called her father last night to wish him a merry Christmas, and to let him know that she was safe.

But as she sat there on the bed she knew that she shouldn't listen to the voice mail that Ryan had left her. She was still upset with him for the way that he had acted the other day, but at the same time she loved him. She missed him so much yesterday, and if it hadn't been for Anna she knew that she would have ran back to at some point yesterday. Anna had been right though she couldn't run back to him that fast he needed to understand with just how much she had been hurt when he had left the tree lot with out him.

Now though more then 24 hours since she had last spoken to him she would have given anything to him. She picked up her cell phone along with the room key and walked outside. As she found someplace to sit down she listen to the fifteen-voice message that Ryan had left her. Each one made her missed him even more. He had sounded really sorry in all his messages, but it was more the tone in his voice then the words that he had said. It was the way that he was worried about her searching though of Newport for her, she had known that he stopped by her father's house sometime yesterday afternoon, but the fact that he mention in his voicemail that he had been all over Newport searching for her made her just melt. She dialed his number in the hopes that he would pick up. "I'm so sorry," he heard his voice say on the other end.

"I know," she said into the phone as she leaned against the wall. "As much as I love you Ryan, I still don't know how I'm suppose to forgive you for walking out."

"I don't know," he said. "I know that what I did was wrong, but I love you and willing to make it up. Where are you? I want to prove it to you."

"How about we just talk on the phone. I'm not ready to see you yet," she said. She knew that if she had seen him she would forgive him for everything, and she wasn't ready for that yet.

"Okay," he said. "I'm sitting at your place with the tree I brought yesterday morning waiting for you to come home and help me put the decorations on it."

"Really?" she asked.

"Yes brought the tree in, and found some decoration in your closest. Between yours, and the ones that I brought we should have enough. It isn't what waiting for you to put on the tree though it is what's waiting for you under the tree."

"Well how about you give me some hints on what it is," she said as she looked down at the ring on her finger.

"I'm not sure I can do that," he said.

"Why not?"

"Well for one there is really no way to describe what is under the tree. Well expect for it is something that can't be wrapped, and I hope something that you really enjoy."

"Well I should be home sometime this afternoon, maybe we can talk then," she said.

"How about we have a date tonight," he said. "Maybe I make you dinner, and we could talk."

"I would like that. I think we need a long talk about everything going on," she said.

"I know I feel like we haven't really been talking lately. I miss it."

"Me too," she said. "I missed you."

"I miss you too. I feel like everything we been though we haven't really gone though it together."

"I know," she said. "I didn't mean for it to turn out like this. I guess we still have a lot of issues to get over.

"Yeah," he said. "I went over to the Cohen's house the other night. They were sleeping, but I just went around back. I realized how much I miss them. I saw Seth, Marissa and Jack and realized that I'm missing a huge part in my brother's life. I don't mean to take it out on you. I guess I just never realized how much I missed the Cohen's."

"I know, I guess that is why I've been so distant the past three months. It was like I just felt that if I wasn't around you could be happy."

"I am happy with you Summer. Don't every think that I am not. It's just that I got taken away from one family. I really hurt that I lost another one."

"But you gained a new family," she said. She knew that it wouldn't make him feel better, but she helped it that helped.

"I know, " he said.

-----

AN: I hope you guys enjoy. What does Ryan have waiting for Summer? How is parent hood going to effect Seth/Marissa? And will the fab four every get to be friends again. Stay tune for next chapter, but please review.


	11. the most important moment

AN: Well here you guys go the latest chapter to my fanfic. Thank you for the reviews, and I'm glad you guy think my writing is getting stronger as I go along. I for one love where this story has gone, and pretty much have the rest of the story planned out. There be three more chapter in order to finish up this arch, and then how to the last part. Where we find out if Seth/Marissa/Ryan/Summer can be friends again. I hope you enjoy this new chapter. Please review.

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As she finished up the finally touches on Seth's breakfast she made sure that she had the coffee just the way that he like it, little bit of cream with two sugars, the pancakes where stacked perfect in the middle of the plate, and two slices of turkey bacon were on the side of the plate along with a glass of OJ. She had figured for all the times that Seth had allowed her to sleep in that he deserved it also. She looked over at Jack as he slept in the seat that she had placed on the counter this morning. She loved these moments with him when no one else was around it just made her realize how much he meant to her, and for everything that had gone wrong in her life something had turned out to be right.

She walked over to Jack and placed him in her arms as she turned around, and balanced the tray of food in the other arm. As she walked out of the house and back into the pool house, she found Seth still a sleep in the bed. There was something about moments like this were she just lost all control of her thoughts about him. Sometime when she would watch Seth with Jack, she would feel a strange feeling deep down inside of her. One that she was not all too sure about, but she knew that as the days went on the moments became stronger, and stronger. She placed the tray on the bedside table, and Jack on the bed next to his father.

The thought of waking him up crossed her mind, but she knew he had been busy lately so one morning might be good for him. She decided to go back into the main house, and as she walked across the grass in her bare feet, she had to admit that she loved how it felt. Living in New York she really didn't get the chance to experience moments like this, but now being back in New Port she wasn't about to let little moments like this pass her by. She walked into the house and felt the change from the grass to the stone, and now to hardwood floor under her feet. She found herself walking into the living room that had become Seth and her office until they could get their own place.

There was a book on the table that caught her attention, it hadn't been there the night before, but she knew it very well it's was Seth's comic book where he drew for his latest comics. She knew that he had to be almost done with it since it had been a few months since the last one had come out. Never once did she admit to anyone that she read his comics, but she did she read it from the very first issue. Now that he was coming out with his 21st issue, she was interested in what he had to say. She wonder just how Ryan and Summer would play and part in the comic, and how she fit into the plot line more so now.

Her eyes looked around the house to make sure no one was around yet. Everyone knew that Seth's drawing book was off limit, but she could not help it. She picked it up and sat down on the couch with it. She notice the style of drawing had changed for the better it was as though his life was focus on the first few pages of this book. As she read though it she notice a strong feeling of hate towards Summer and Ryan characters. They had gone from two of the hero's of the story to the villains who were planning an attack on Seth's character. As she read along more she noticed a new character that he had brought in, someone that she thought might be Sam. She was not sure though, but Sam had been introduce as the new character who walked into Seth life and help him fight Summer, and Ryan. She was amazed with how much his life had been but into this comic, but in the end the last drawing surprised her though. The new character was getting ready to leave, but the had not won the fight against Summer and Ryan, but inside the very last block was of her and Seth characters. It was just a simple drawing, but it had caught her attention.

"How did you like it?" she heard his voice as she felt someone on the couch next to her.

"Amazing," she said lost for words as she found herself drawn to that last drawing. She was torn between the need to ask about it, and the fact that some things just were better off left unsaid between to people until the moment was ready.

"Really? I was not sure how people would feel about it. Most people have invested their money and time in this comic I wouldn't want them to feel it has been ruined."

"I don't think you ruined anything. You wrote a great back story line for why they turned into a villain. As for the new character, I think she fit well into the story. I'm not sure if she needs to stay around though," Marissa said as she turned her body so that she was facing Seth.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I think the ironist and cosmic girl need to explore what you have written here," she said as she opened the last page for him.

"See that where I was torn about where to go. Because of much as the Ironist has these strong feeling towards this new girl he cannot help but get cosmic girl out of his mind. It's like she used her super hero power on him to make him all confused with how he felt towards anything."

"Have you thought about it from her point of view?" she asked as she found herself dying just to touch him. Moments like this turned her upside down, with what she felt towards him.

"I've tried, but every time I think I have it right it seems that something is missing," he said as he shift his body so that he was closer to her.

With him moving closer to her, she felt the butterflies in her stomach. She felt the goose bump of her skin, and the desire to both run away, and to stay as close to him as she could. "Maybe she just as lost as the ironist right now. Maybe every time she is around the ironist she gets goose bumps on her skin, and butterflies in her stomach." She felt her body moving in closer to him as the words were spoken getting softer and softer just so that he could hear it. "Maybe her heart beats so fast she worried that he might hear it, and every time she looks at those lips she wonder what it be like to kiss them."

"Will maybe they need to kiss to figure it out," he said as he moved in closer to her.

Never in her life has she felt she lost for breath. As she moved in closer to him she said, "Maybe they do," as she moved and her lips just gentle touch his she was brought out of this dream like state by the sound of Jack crying.

------

The sounds coming from the living room made her feel all warm inside. It had been years since this house actually felt like a home with a family in it. First Seth had moved out into his own place, and then Ryan had left. The boys had always stopped by though after they moved out to keep the house alive, but the past nine months the house felt so still like no one was living in it. As she picked up her teacup, she noticed Sandy as he sat outside with the morning newspaper.

"Isn't it nice having the day off," she said as she sat on in the chair across from him. It had been a while since they both gotten a chance to be at home together, and she missed it.

"Yeah it is. So what are your plans for today?" he asked as he folded the newspaper over and placed it on the table.

"I was thinking this afternoon maybe we could do something as a family. I'm sure there is something Seth and Marissa would like to do with Jack," Kirsten said as she looked at her husband.

"That's a great idea," Sandy said as he reached across the table and took his wife hand.

"Maybe we could take a drive and see what we find."

"That would be nice," she said. Not all to sure if, that is what she really wanted to do. The last time that both boys were in this house, they had done that. It just felt wrong not having Ryan with them.

"You thinking about Ryan?" Sandy asked after a moment.

"Yeah," Kirsten said unsure of what to say now. "I know that what he did was wrong, and I'm still very hurt over the fact that he was part of the reason that caused Seth so much pain. I don't know though having Seth home with us and seeing how happy he is makes me think about giving Ryan another chance." She said the words just coming out of her mouth.

"Why don't you give him a call?" Sandy said.

"I can't," she said as she looked over towards the house. "I don't know how Seth will handle it. As much as Ryan is a son to me I admit part of me looks out for Seth a little bit more, I guess it is just the mother in me. I just wish that I knew if he was happy or not."

"Well maybe if you like write him a letter or something," Sandy said. "I stand behind you on anything that you do."

She was thankful to have a husband like Sandy in a time like this. It just made her realize how much she had in this life, and how much she wished that Seth and Marissa might be able to find something like this. "Thank you," was all that she could get out at that moment.

"You stand by me when I need it, and I stand by you when you need it," he said.

"Isn't that how marriage is supposed to work?"

"Yes it is," she said.

"Talking about marriage, have you noticed something going on between Seth and Marissa?"

"Like what do you mean?"

"Something just feels different between them. It's like I don't know I keep catching them in this moments."

"Do you mean like sleeping in each other arms on the couch, or the fact that Seth just stares at Marissa when he drawing," Kirsten said as she looked into the house.

"Yeah, or this morning. I had gone out early to get some surfing in, and when I come back, I notice them in the living room. I couldn't really hear what they were saying, but by the look of it I think they were almost ready to kiss."

"To be honest if they don't end up at least trying to date I will be very surprised. I just can't see either one of them raising Jack together, and at least trying to be together."

"I know what you mean. I think though that give them time and they figure it out."

"Yeah," she said.

---------

As she walked into her place, she noticed the Christmas tree in the middle of the living room. It was bare, but under it laid a single box. She looked around for any sign of Ryan, but when she noticed she was alone she felt her heart sink a bit. She was hoping for Ryan to be here when she got home. She walked over to the box, and sat down beside it. 'To my greatest love, sorry I couldn't be here, but open this up.' Read the card on top of the box. As she opened it up, she could not wait to see what he had placed inside of it. In the box was a single piece of paper. 'I want to prove my love to you in a way that you will never forget. By the time you find me, I want you to be craving for the moment spent with me. For you first clue: You drive me insane when you smell like this.'

She got up from the floor, and walked into the bathroom with the piece of paper in her hand. The only thing that she knew that drove him insane was when she got out of the shower smelling like her strawberry body gel. As reached for the bottle she noticed another note, but before she read it there was something, she needed to do. She got into the shower. She did not know what he had planned for her tonight, but when she found him, she wanted nothing more then to drive him insane.

As she stepped out of the shower, she wrapped a towel around her body before picking up the next note. 'I bet that you don't only smell sexy right now, but I bet as you read this note you are wearing that towel I placed next to the shower for you. I wish that I could be there right now. To stand in the door way and watch you walked down the hall to your room as I wonder what you are going to wear for the night." She did as the note said she walked down to her room were on the foot of her bed she found a little black dress. She took her time and put the dress on herself, only to notice another note under the dress.

'I am sitting here wondering how that dress fits. I bet it brings out all the great features on your body and that it hides all those magic little places that I love to touch as I gentle caress you body. I have never told you this, but one of my favorite moments when we are going out is that two hours you spend getting ready. It is all worth it when we head out the door, and I get to show you off to the world at our favorite pre date spot.' As she read each word, she finds her body craving the need to be around him. These past three months she did not feel this way and almost forgot what it was like. It was these feeling that made falling in love all worth it.

The next spot she new all to well where to go. He could not have written an easier clue for her to find. It had been there spot when she was with Seth, some place that they could meet where no one would even know about. The ride in the car felt like it went on forever she knew it was just a short drive, but the anticipation of what was to come had this huge effect on her. As she pulled up to the spot on the beach she felt her heart drop as she noticed that Ryan's car was nowhere in site. She got out of the car, and walk a bit down the beach until she reached their bench. It was their that she found yet another clue. As she picked up the note, she felt her heart stop for a second before she read it. " It was in this very spot a little over a year ago that we realized there was something more between us then the friendship that we had. I am not sure on how this all come about, but I do know one thing. If I were given a chance to redo this year, I would not change a thing. I loved this year for all that it brought. We agree that we need to talk about how everything has changed, and I guess that is what I am doing here. For all the hurt that I have gone though this year with losing the Cohen's I have gained so much more love in my life from you. I am not going to lie to you I do miss the family bond I used to have with Sandy, Kirsten and Seth, but I miss it more because I wish they could see how happy I am with you. Never in all my life have I ever been so happy. I wish I could promise you the world, but if anything I have learned from this year is what I can promise you. I can promise that I be next to you when you wake up in the morning, that I will teach you how to cook breakfast, that I will stay by your side when your suffer from your rage black out. I promise to try not to be the cause of them, and I promise to always love you though everything. Therefore, I guess what I am trying to say Summer is that I love you. I love you in away that words cannot explain. So I guess how about you turn around," she read that last word and turn around to find Ryan just a few feet away. She reached up and wiped the tears from here check that had fallen while reading the letter.

She could not get to him fast enough as she wrapped her arms around him. Never in her life had a moment brought so much emotion inside of her. "Summer Roberts, I know I asked you already, but will you marry me?"

"Yes," she said as she leaned in and kissed him. As much as she loved the first time that he had asked her three months ago it was this one that she was going to remember for the rest of her life.

He slipped his arms around he waist as he said, "Thank god, if you said no I just wasted my most romantic idea on you."

She let out a small laugh as she placed her head on his shoulder, "Well it was perfect. Expect I should have spent two hours getting ready instead of rushing."

"Were you in a rush or something?"

"You had me wondering what was coming next," she said as she looked up at him. "So what is next?"

"Actually this is as far as I had planned. I didn't want to get my hopes to high just in case you weren't in love with me anymore."

"How could I not be in love with you? I know that I have not been myself for a while, and I am sorry about that. It's just that I was scared that you would regret losing your family over me, and I don't want you regretting anything that we do."

"I don't," he said as he placed his hand on her face. "It might hurt me sometimes, but I'm more hurt over the fact that we can't share our love with the most important people in my life."

"I know," she said.

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AN: Well I hope that you guys have enoyed the latest chapter. Now what will chapter 12 bring? A Seth/Marissa kiss? Kirsten writing a letter to Ryan? Summer and Ryan falling in love? Will the fab four every become friends again


	12. love

AN: Hey guys sorry for the delay in updates, but life has gotten in the way. My mother has been in the hospital for almost 2 months, and my father passed away on 2/15 of this year. She needless to say writing has not been on the top of my list. I will try to update more often.

He glanced at his watch real quick as he noticed that it was already two in the morning, but he knew that he still had about two more hours before Jack woke up though out the night. One thing that was certain in his life was the son that he loved so much more then life itself. Jack was the only thing that kept him grounded and in a time like this, he needed that more than anything else. His feeling had been thrown up in the air over the past few days. Every time he spent a few hours with Sam, he found that he enjoyed her company, but he always felt bad for not being home with Jack and Marissa. On the other hand, every time he was with Marissa and Jack he lost track of time, and had huge butterflies in his stomach.

The thought of being close to Marissa scared the crap out of him. When he was in the same room, he could not control what he did. Like the other day, he came so close to kissing her. He wanted to so bad just to know what he felt like to kiss the most amazing women in his life. He wanted to touch her skin and feel what it was like to be with a women like her, most of the time though he just wanted to know what he was like to hold her, and not in the best friend way either, but in a way that only lovers could hold each other.

As much as it had been a habit over the past four months to sleep in the same bad the past few nights he found himself either out in Newport somewhere as he tried to clear his mind, or just across the room as he watched her sleep. It was in these hours that he lost all control of his thoughts about her. There was no doubt that he had these thoughts about it, but did he love her?

He had only been in love once in his life, but what he felt towards Marissa was something different. He respected her, wanted nothing more than for her to be happy, and would give anything to make her smile just a little bit when she was upset. He loved the moments they spent with their son, and how for the first time he felt his life was perfect. However, his heart was torn because for as perfect as his life with Marissa was he could never forget Sam. Sam was the girl that helped him get over Summer. Without Sam would, he had been able to be the man he was today. He just was not sure if he could love Sam the way that she deserved to be loved.

"Hey shouldn't you be at home with my sister?" he heard a voice say as he turned his head to face her.

"Well it depends what are you doing down on the pier so late?" Seth as she he turned around and leaned against the railing of the pier.

"If you most know a good friend of mine was playing at the bait shop," she said as she moved a bit closer to Seth. "I was about to head home when I notice you down here. I thought you might just need to talk to someone."

"Just complication of the heart," he said as he looked at her. She looked more and more like Marissa as the years past.

"Let me guess does it have something to with my sister?" Kaitlin asked as she leaned across the railing. "Because no offence to you, but I swear she has more guys falling all over her then I can count."

"Actually you be surprised with how your sister has changed. I know that things haven't been great between you guys, but I'm sure she would love for you to met Jack," Seth said as she turned towards the girl he had not seen in what felt like forever. "Even if Marissa does feel different, I would love for you to meet him." He said as he stressed the word I.

"I would love that. So now on to matters of the heart, I'm guessing you thought you could just be friends with my sister, and now you have fallen in love."

He looked away for a moment as he tried to figure out just what he wanted to say. The thoughts had been in his head for a while now, but if he said everything out load then it would make it real. "Actually I don't know if I have fallen in love with her, but it just my feeling are different towards her then what I have felt towards other girls over the years. It like we share this life together and I give anything to see that smile on her face. She is the one girl who no matter what happens in my life I want to put her first. With her, I never want to be that guy who is the father of her son. I want to be the guy that all her friends wonder about, but mainly I want to be that guy who catches her attention from across a room and she knows that she has me in the palm of my hand."

"Well Cohen to me it sounds like you love my sister," she said as she stepped back away from her. "I haven't seen her in a few years, but I do know when I saw you guys the other day down at the beach I knew that my sister was happy. So what ever you do just keep her happy for me."

"I try," Seth said as he leaned back against the railing again. "But I mean it the offer there for you to come and see us."

"I know, but I should get going," she said as she started to walk away.

He was surprised with just how easy it came off his chest. They had been buried so deep inside of him that he thought they would never be able to be said out loud. The only problem he had now was how to tell Sam. He wanted to be friends with her, but he wondered if they would ever be able to more past all this. It was not like he planned to fall in love with Marissa, but the late night talks and those little moments just kind of help him to realize it.

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As she stood in the doorway to the back yard, she could not figure out just where she fit into this family. At first, she had hoped that maybe she could fit in, and that she and Seth could make it. Now though just a month after Jack had been born it was clear that she really did not fit in the picture. She watched as Seth lay on the grass just a few feet away from her and acted liked the only people that were around could be found on the ground next to him. As she watched Seth and Marissa together, she knew that she was the only one that stood in the way of the two of them.

She started to walk back when she bumped into someone, "I'm so sorry," she said as she turned around to face a person she did not know, but who could only be Marissa sister.

"That's okay," she said. "I'm Kaitlin by the way."

"I'm Sam, Seth girlfriend," Sam said as she looked at Kaitlin. She soon noticed that the young girl eyes were no longer on her, but instead what was outside.

"No offense to you, since we just met, but if you are his girl friend, then what is my sister doing with him?"

"They are just friends," Sam said as she said it she tried to believe it herself, but she knew it was a lie.

"No one can be friends with Marissa Cooper without falling in love with her," Kaitlin said.

She was not sure what to say. She knew that the way that Seth looked at Marissa was much stronger than any look he could every give her. "I know," was all that she was able to get out of her mouth. "It just I guess I rather just act like I don't see it."

"Can I give you some advice," Kaitlin said as she moved a little closer to Sam.

"Sure," Sam said she figured maybe this young girl could give her some insight to the people around her.

"As much as you want to believe that Seth hasn't fallen in love with Marissa he has. You can see it in the way he acts, or even in his drawing," Kaitlin said as she handed her Seth's drawing book. "You can see it for yourself, but Seth Cohen is so in love with Marissa Cooper." She said as she walked out of the house.

Sam just stood there for a moment unsure of just what to say to all this. As she held the book in her hand, she debated about what she would find inside the book. As she placed the book on the counter, she opened it up to just some random page. She felt her heart sink as she noticed a drawing as Marissa sleeping on the couch. It was done perfect, but it was what he had written under it that made her realize his true feeling. 'The most perfect women'.

As she was about to walk out of the room she felt someone walk in. "Hey you aren't leaving are you, My dad just getting the grill ready?"

She turned around to face him she knew that she needed to do it, but it would be hard. "Yeah I think I'm going to leave, but before I do I just want to say something. I hope that you and Marissa find the love in each other that you are looking for."

"Thanks, I really didn't plan for this to happen, but I guess when you spend so much time with one person it's hard not fall in love," he said as he stepped closer to Sam. "Sam can we still stay in touch?"

"Yes," she said as she moved closer to him, and gave him a hug. "Seth you taught me so much about life. If you give anything to Marissa it will be those small moments in life that mean the most to her." As she said that, she walked away from Seth. She knew that she had done the right thing, but it still hurt as she left someone like him

Part of her waited for Seth to leave like he had been, and part of her hoped that maybe night he might actually stay with her. She knew that he had been either sleeping on the couch, or going out somewhere, and she knew the reason for it. There was no hiding the fact that something had changed between her and Seth, and as scared as she was for her world to go crashing down she would give anything just to have a moment with him. However, he had been with Sam, and she could not hurt someone who cared so much about Seth. Now though they were both alone.

Alone, that was not something she felt when she was with Seth Cohen. She could not remember the last time she actually felt alone. It had to be the month before she had run to Seth to tell him about his son. Those months she had been alone, but as soon as she came to the airport, she knew that she would never be alone again. She had been right, when they were together she never felt alone.

"Are you awake?" she heard him say in a soft tone as to not wake her if she was asleep.

She rolled over in bed to face him. She did not want to speak to him so instead just moved closer to him, and placed her head on his chest. It was just a simple act one, that she had done count less time, but this time it felt different she felt like she had everything she could every want in just this second. She felt those butterflies in her stomach.

They both just laid there for few moments just getting used to each other all over again. It was Seth who decided to speak first, "Marissa," he said as he placed his hand on top of hers. "I don't know where to start so I'm just going to say things, and most likely ramble on. So if he wanted me to shut up just let me know. Marissa Cooper, never in all my life did I ever imaging meeting someone, and feeling those feeling that go though my body every moment I am around you, when I am with you the only thing that matter if you. I would give anything to see you smile, to hear you laugh, or just to know you were happy. I want you to be that girl that everyone envy because of me. I want to be that guy that when we are at a New Port event I catch your eye from across the room, and we just drop everything to be together. I want to be able to lie in bed with you at night, and kiss you gentle. I want to know what make you tick both as a person, and as a lover. I want to be a father to our son, and I want to be your man. I guess where I am going with this is, Marissa Cooper I love you. I'm not sure where this love has come from, but I am crazy about you."

Never in all her life had, someone said something like that to her. She loved it she loved the way he could just make her melt with his words. As he finished what he was saying. She moved so that she was straddling him. She felt a tear fall down her check as she tried to find the right words. "Every night I lay in this bed with you and feel so glad to have a person like you in my life. You are everything I have looked for in a man. You are a great father to you son, and for the time in a long time Seth you have actually put me, and him before anything else. That is why I love you also. I love you because no matter how hard this is going to get I know that you will stand by my side. You will help guide me, and I will help guide you. I am not sure when my feeling started for you, but I love you. I love everything about you."

She wanted nothing more to kiss him at this moment, but she could not. She could not more her body instead; she just sat there staring into those eyes, the eyes of the man that she could not image life without. The man she needed so bad. She needed him in all ways heart, mind, soul, and body. As she lean down into him. She felt the world getting smaller and smaller. The only thing that matter to her was those lips touching her lips. When they finally touched, she was lost for everything. Her body just melted into his, and for the first time she felt like she was in heaven.

AN: Sorry for lack of Summer/Ryan in this chapter, but I needed to bring Seth and Marissa together so that I can finish the final act of this story.


	13. AN

AN: Well I'm torn between finishing this fanfic or not. Well from my last post you learn that my father passed away, but six weeks after that my mother also passed. I am been sitting her debating about finishing this. I had a ending planned out, but I think I want something a little darker of a story line. So if you guys would like to see me finish this fanfic on a little darker note I would be glad to do so, but if not I understand. So if you could please review and let me know.

Megan


	14. Life and Death

AN: Well guys thank you for the feedback. I have decided to go a different route with this fanfic, but I think all of you will enjoy what I am about to do. At least I hope so.

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As the past six months passed right before his eyes, he could not believe how he was settling into this new life. Sure, he missed the Cohen's family there was not a day that went by that he did not think about them. He wondered if they would have support him and Summer. How Seth son was doing. He had drove by a few times just to catch a glimpse of the old life that he once had, but he could not live in the past anymore he had a new life to plan for and that was what he was doing today.

He had wished to have this talk in some place other than the hospital, but Neil had a meeting he was unable to leave. Ryan thought about rescheduling it but with the wedding plans, and how busy his business had become over the past few months he was lucky to slip away from life for a few hours. Whenever he had a moment to slip away, he liked to spend it with Summer. He felt a smile cross his face as he thought about her. Summer just made him feel wonderful inside, and made this whole meeting well worth the worrying.

Looking back, he knew that he should have done this earlier, but at the same time, he never did anything right when it came to major choices in his life. Therefore, as he walked into the small little cafeteria he was surpised to see Neil sitting in a corner with a woman. He had to take a double look as he looked at the frail woman that was sitting across from him. She was strong he could tell, but he could also tell that she was tired of fighting. He had seen that look in his mother eyes the last time that they had spoken, before she went on a four day drinking binge and overdosed on alcohol. Now he was taken back even more so when he noticed the woman was not just someone Neil knew, but Kirsten.

The sight of Kirsten made Ryan stop dead in his track. It had been months since he had last seen her, but he never remember her looking sick. As he started to walk towards the table, he noticed Kirsten getting up. "Well Neil it was nice seeing you, but I really should get going." As he heard of speak she noticed a different tone in her voice as though she just wanted to break down right in front of him, but was holding back. It was always like Kirsten to hold things in until to late.

As she turned around, he got a good look at her and all he could say, "Hey."

"Hi," was all that she said back to him. "Sorry I can't stay, but I have to get going."

Before he knew, it she was gone from his life again. Gone without even asking how everything was going, gone before he even had the chance to ask about Jack. Seeing Kirsten just made him realize how much he was missing. However, he had come here for a reason today, and he did not want to waste Neil time.

"How are you doing Ryan?" He asked as Ryan sat in the seat Kirsten had just moved from.

"I'm doing well. What about yourself? Hope that work isn't keeping you to busy," Ryan said as she sat up in the chair a bit.

"Work is the same, but actually I had something to ask you," he said.

"Ask away," Ryan, said a little worried about where this whole thing was going.

"I hate to come right out and ask this, but since Summer is my little girl I have a right to know. There is talk in to community that your business is moving. Is that true?"

"Yes sir," Ryan said, as he looked Neil right in the eyes. "That is the reason for today meeting. There had been talked about moving my branch for a while now and although the details are still up in the air. I wanted to ask you if it would be okay if Summer moved from the area."

"Well son, as much as I am going to miss my daughter if you should move I am glad that you came and talk to me about it. I know that we haven't always seen eye to eye on certain things, but you make my daughter happy and that is all that I can ask for." As he said that, his cell phone went off. "I'm sorry for Ryan, but I need to go."

"Okay thank you for your time."

"Your welcome, maybe one day you and Summer could stop by for dinner."

"Yeah," Ryan said as he watched Neil walk away.

As he watched Neil, walk away he was brought back to the moment of Kirsten. He was taken back at the sight that he had just witness. He pulled out his cell phone, and dialed the one number he knew by heart. "Hey you," she said on the other end.

"Hey Sum, I know you said you where busy tonight something came up and I really need to talk. Can you cut out a little early?" he asked as he started to walk out into the lobby.

"Do you need me now?" she asked.

"No, just when ever you can get off. Just give me a call not sure if I will be at home."

"Okay, Ryan if you need anything promises me that you will call."

"I will," he said as he hung up the phone. He walked passed the family lounge, and was taken back by the sight in front of him.

---------

She sat there just watching him as he sat alone on the other side of the room. She was still in shock herself with the news that they had received this morning. She knew the reason for Kirsten doing this she want to be the burden on anyone especially with Jack in the picture now, but at the same time Seth had the right to know what was going on. She picked Jack up in her arms and walked over to Seth.

As she moved closer, she could see the tears starting to form in his eyes as if he was torn between wanting to be strong or to let life slip away for a while. Marissa hoped that he would not act strong for her, and as she sat down next to him. She noticed that his body posture loosened a bit as she gentle touched his hand. Over the past six months they had realized what they both needed was each other. "Are you okay?"

"No," he said as she looked up and into her eyes for the first time.

'no' just came out so fast that it had to be honest, and she was glad that he was being honest with her at this time. She handed Jack over to him, and as he looked down at Jack, she noticed a small smile across his face. She moved her body so that she was leaning up against him. It was just a simple act, but the physically touch was just what he needed at this moment. "Do you want to talk?"

"I don't know," he said as he looked down at Jack. "It's just I'm so lost with everything going on. I thought my mom was acting weird the past few months, but I never in my mind expected her to be this sick. Before today, my life was going great. I finally felt that I had found where I belonged. I did not care about anything but you, Jack and my family. Now though everything is crashing down around me."

At first, she did not say anything she just sat there and let the worlds sink in for a moment. She knew that right now she had to pick her words carefully unless she might say or do something wrong. "Seth, I know that right now you are scared, because I'm scared. I am scared of what life is going to be like without Kirsten. She has been more of a mom to me over the past seven months then my mom has been over my whole life. I have been wondering how we are going to get though all those little moments when we need advice from someone. Such as remember just a week ago when we could not get Jack to sleep at all. He would not nap, and he would not sleep for more then an hour a night. It was hell on both of us. I think for three days we were walking zombies, but when we finally gave in you mom took Jack for the night and had him sleeping. It was our first sleep full night, but as we laid there in bed, I realized that there still so much about being a mom that I do not know. I guess where I am going with this is I understand why Kirsten or Sandy did not tell us about her being sick. They didn't want us to feel like we were a burden to them, but you know what?" she waited until he looked up at her. "I think Kirsten would still want to be here for us. She would want to help us out as much as she can. So as much as we might hurt at this moment we need to remember to make our moments counts because we never know how long we have with her."

She waited for him to say something but instead he just sat there looking at her. Holding Jack in his arms, and just allowing the worlds to go though his mind. "Thanks," was all that he said before he leaned in a place a gentle kiss on her lips.

The kissed deepened a bit as she felt both their bodies craving the closeness that came along with a kiss. She gentle sucked on his bottom lips before she pulled away wanting more, but knowing that it was not the time or place.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you too," she said as she placed her head on his shoulder.

---------

The need to call Sandy was so great at this moment, but they had made it clear to him when no one called to tell him Kristen was sick. No one even tried to call him, or to stop by. Kirsten had made it clear today in the hospital that she did not want him knowing. So why did he care? Maybe because the Cohen's family was his first real family, somewhere that he actually fit in. Maybe it had to due with the fact that even though they have not spoken for over a year he missed them.

He missed what life used to be like before everything changed. It was not that he regretted the things that had happened because he did not. He just regretted the way that things had happened between everyone. He heard his phone ring and without even looking down he said, "hey Summer."

"Hey you, I'm on my way home from work. Do you want me to go to the house, or meet you someplace?"

"I'm at the beach," he said in just a simple tone. She would know where to find him. It was there place, and a place he ran to often.

"Is everything okay?" Summer asked.

"I rather tell you in person," he said as he lay back so his head was on the sand under him.

"Okay, I'll be there as quick as I can," Summer said before she hung up the phone.

The wait just seemed to last forever, when in truth it had not taken her more then twenty minutes to get to him. When Summer knew that he needed her, there was nothing that could stop her. He felt a body next to him in the sand, and without words, he just looked up at her.

"Please tell me what happened?" Summer said as she took his hand.

He explained how he sure Kirsten at the hospital today, and how sick she looked. He explained seeing Marissa and Seth in the waiting room. How Seth looked like he had seen a ghost, and was ready to cry. He explained what he has been feeling all day, and all he needed to call Sandy, but they had made it clear that they did not want him in their life. As he finished up, he just looked at Summer. He loved her, and did not want her to think she felt it was her fault.

"Ryan maybe since it's been so long they don't know how to tell you. Maybe Kirsten is sitting in the hospital right now torn just like you. Torn between calling you, and not calling you she mostly wants to but scared at the same time," Summer said.

"How did you get so smart," Ryan said as he sat up and placed his arm around her shoulder.

"I guess all this time with you has rubbed off on me," she said with a small smile.

"I love you," he said as he leaned down and kissed her.

"I love you too."

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AN: So what did you guys think? I know it's a bit of a change in the story line I had going, but I don't think it's to much. Can Seth/Marissa and Ryan/Summer last though this hard time? What's wrong with Kirsten? Will Ryan be welcome back into the Cohen family?


	15. AN:: anyone out there

I know it's been a while.. I was wondering if anyone out there would like for me to finish this story? Please let me know. If I get enough people I would love to finish it. I've been out of writing for a while and figure this would be a great place to get back into it.

thanks Megan


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